E.56 Neurology, Spirituality, The Law Of Attraction and Assumptions With Lisa Dennis

In this episode, we welcome back Lisa Dennis, who was involved in episode 8. This time, we talk about spirituality, neurology, the law of assumption and attraction, self-concept, and trauma and how they are all related. It is sometimes hard to see how spirituality is an essential part of healing your mental health but Lisa discusses how this has happened in her own life, as well as how our own narrative and self-concept can play against what you truly what you want to heal. We also discuss different authors which I have attached here below.

Woohoo stuff can also be based on neurology and psychology and this discussion really reflects that.   

You can reach Lisa for Tarot card readings here


Abraham Hicks can be found here

Neville Goddard can be found here

The Alchemist can be purchased here

Dr. Masaru Emoto can be found here

Transcript

Steve Bisson: 0:01

Hi and welcome to finding your way through therapy. I am your host, Steve Bisson. I'm an author and mental health counselor. Are you curious about therapy? Do you feel there is a lot of mystery about there? Do you wonder what your therapist is doing and why? The goal of this podcast is to make therapy and psychology accessible to all by using real language and straight to the point discussions. This podcast wants to remind you to take care of your mental health, just like you would your physical health. therapy should not be intimidating. It should be a great way to better help. I will demystify what happens in counseling, discuss topics related to mental health and discussions you can have what your thoughts, I also want to introduce psychology in everyday life. As I feel most of our lives are enmeshed in psychology. I want to introduce the subtle and not so subtle ways psychology plays a factor in our lives. It will be my own mix of thoughts as well as special guests. So join me on this discovery of therapy and psychology. Hi, and welcome to episode 56 of finding your way through therapy. I am Steve B. So if you haven't listened to Episode 55 yet, please do so it was a great conversation with character Alan Baldwin else. We talked about emergency work and it was really worthwhile to go back to listen to it if you can. But episode 56 would be with Lisa Dennis. Lisa Dennis has been a guest before on episode eight. And we talked about wrestling. But this time we're going to talk about different stuff. We want to talk about the law of attraction, the law of assumption how that relates to the quantum feel, the emotional state of individuals and how it relates to trauma. So I hope that this little teaser will be very beneficial. And here is the interview. Hi, and welcome to episode 56 of finding your way through therapy. And this is episode six on YouTube. So don't forget to go see that if you're listening to the podcast. And if you're watching it on YouTube, go on my podcast that episode 56 I'm bringing back a guest. And obviously you wouldn't be able to tell because you didn't see her on episode eight. But on Episode Eight, Lisa Dennis came in. And we talked about the psychology of wrestling. And it was interesting because we've known each other for a long time. And we love talking about wrestling. But we'd love even more talking about our spirituality. So Lisa, I just want to welcome you again.

Lisa Dennis: 2:18

Yeah, thank you. Yeah, happy to be back. Thank you for having me that

Steve Bisson: 2:21

and you told me about the wig. Tell everyone about the week because I think is great. Both of us being cancers. It's a

Lisa Dennis: 2:28

brain cancer season, baby. Yeah, it's the Cancer New Moon. And you know, I thought it was fitting. I knew we would talk a little bit about manifestation tonight. So I thought we would give some of the undersea cancer vibes tonight for the look. And for all your Gen Z listeners. I hope it's giving help.

Steve Bisson: 2:45

And it's a nice blue wig that we for those of you listening on the podcast before we start, I know we're gonna go into spirituality. Just based on our last conversation on episode eight for those of you want to go back you can go ahead and do so I couldn't wear it because of the the earbuds but just wanted to show you my 1997 so had of the Heart Foundation just to throw it a little bit out there.

Unknown: 3:08

I did not know you're gonna throw that kind of shade at me or I would have brought some HBK merch to the pod tonight.

Steve Bisson: 3:13

Well, that's why I didn't tell you.

Lisa Dennis: 3:15

Thank you. Yeah, thank you. Hey, we'll just be fine. That's not a work. That's actual heat for me at the top of the spirituality. Video. That's perfect.

Steve Bisson: 3:27

You know what I got to start off with a little heat. That's how you get people to like you eventually. So for those of you who don't know you, Lisa, how about you describe yourself or tell me a little bit more about yourself? Yeah,

Unknown: 3:41

so by day, I am a strategist for a large national financial institution. But my side gig is as a long time and I'm talking many decades tarot reader. So I'm well versed in tarot card reading, particularly as it pertains to kind of high level soul connections of people who might identify as things like soulmates or karmic partners or twin flames. That's a hot button in the spiritual community right now, I know, don't come from me. But I also have spent the last few years really reading and diving into law of assumption and law of attraction. And it has even influenced not just my spiritual practices, but myself as a tarot reader kind of understanding how individuals around us reflect back to us the state of the subconscious mind. So that's kind of where my woowoo kind of spirituality side resides, right as in kind of the spiritual advisory space, perhaps much like somebody like such as yourself might be doing Reiki or providing energy work. I like to think of what I provide as insights into the subconscious. That's kind of how I've come to understand the archetypes of tarot.

Steve Bisson: 4:51

I think the archetypes pair are misunderstood a lot. And people just think it's a bunch of cards and a bunch of woowoo stuff, but there is intuition and there stuff that comes from within when we feel that it's the energy work that we get from the cards, frankly. But you mentioned, one of the things that you talked about is the law of attraction. And a lot of people from maybe our generation to Gen Z population, not so much. But the Gen Xers we remember the secret our fair share, because Oprah Winfrey talked about it. So we had to know about it. But how about we talk a little bit about that law of attraction to start off with, because that's a good basis to go into the losses of assumptions and a quantum leaps that we're going to make from

Unknown: 5:29

there. Yeah, for sure. So I you know, you bring up the secret, I think a lot of people come to the law of attraction via something like the secret and the teachings of, say, Abraham Hicks, right, which I think a lot of people from our generation are super familiar with Esther Hicks who channels kind of a collection, that's a collective of entities known as Abraham, and Esther Hicks and Abraham Hicks, the general kind of feel is that you're, you're looking for a vibrational feeling. And if you can think about it even more, so kind of this idea that everything around us, and there's some science to this right is is vibrating at a certain frequency, right, so what we're looking to do is become kind of a vibrational match to that thing that we're after. That's kind of the boil down that of Abraham Hicks that you kind of have what they refer to as this vortex of kind of desires, right? These things that are existing in an energetic state. And your goal is to align your vibration to that vibration and kind of allow this builds on the teachings of a gentleman from the early 1900s into the 1940s, known as Neville Goddard, Neville is a great resource for those of you who really want to kind of understand this better trigger warning, if you have religious trauma, Neville will be very difficult to get into it. First, you will need especially if you have Judeo Christian or Catholic trauma or guilt, you'll need to kind of peel that back a little because there's a lot of allegory with Neville to the Bible, and kind of how the Bible is codified language. So you need to kind of get through some of that, right. But Neville too, is talking about this idea that there's a living and kind of an end state a feeling of that thing that you want a feeling like you already have that thing that you want. And that that feeling, again, brings about that kind of vibration. I think scientifically, you know, we could probably get into talking about some quantum mechanics, right, but kind of, essentially, you're, you're seeking away a certain waveform, or you're seeking to bring yourself into a certain frequency form. And much like Abraham Hicks will talk about kind of raising your vibes from things like anger and fear to things like you know, love, harmony, acceptance. Nevels, kind of talking about that same idea of bringing the self to a point where you're really feeling into who that person that has that thing is. So that's kind of the best primer I think I can give on Law of Attraction is that we're attracting to us constantly with whatever vibrational state we're kind of currently putting out. And we're doing it all the time in kind of a subconscious reality that the conscious mind, you probably would know better than I do is having how many thoughts a day

Steve Bisson: 8:29

you have anywhere from 60,000 to 82,000 thoughts in a day, something to the effect of about 85% of them are negative and 90% are repetitive.

Unknown: 8:39

So I think if we're thinking like intent in that type of context, right, what's really interesting to me is that the subconscious brain it doesn't know reality from non reality. And if you challenge me on that, somebody who is an LM HC sitting right here with me, I would say, if you have PTSD, and you hear a door slam in your house, it's going to trigger your fight or flight like like a saber toothed Tiger is coming for you. That's subconscious mind that thing triggering the sympathetic nervous system has zero idea. It doesn't know. That's the same subconscious mind that is running the programming. It's the engine room running the programming, when you're thinking about what you're putting out there. Think about how many repetitive thoughts you don't even realize that you're having and some of the self narrative that you are telling yourself is just based on repetition. That's it's a deeply dug neuro pathway, right? So it's kind of this idea that this thing is always going. It's always kind of manifesting outwardly into the world. And yet, until you bring focus and awareness to the thing, it's just doing that on autopilot. And there are ways and techniques to help you make that work for you.

Steve Bisson: 9:55

Right and for those of you who don't understand a little bit of what Lisa was talking about, if you heard The roar of a saber toothed Tiger 20,000 years ago, you would automatically think fight or flight. Because that's what you do with saber toothed tigers 20,000 years ago. Nowadays you have a trauma with a door closing, fight or flight, it's the same exact thing. It's the same trigger. It's the same response. I like to talk about the midbrain. When I talk about that, and the midbrain doesn't go into thought process, it goes into what I gotta do to keep myself alive right now. And so I think that when you think about the the laws of assumption, there's a lot of it that's also attached to trauma. In my opinion, I know for sure. And I think that that's where a little bit of where you want it to go, I'm assuming, but I wanted to simplify it a little bit a little bit. Because I know that from my perspective, it's sometimes difficult to understand why I get triggered by I always try to use something like a chair, I try to use things that don't trigger people trigger warnings for those who are affected by chairs, I guess. But at the end of the day, it's realizing that it's not something that we necessarily control. It's our midbrain, because there is no superhighway to the upper brain or cerebral cortex. And our assumption at that point is I'm in danger.

Unknown: 11:11

Yeah, so I think what's most interesting about the law of assumption, and I suppose to really get here, we'll need to talk a little bit about what neville goddard refers to is everyone is you pushed out this is a this is kind of the heart of his teaching. So there's, there's a whole bunch of different ways that we can interpret this. So this is kind of like a like a pick your flavor, choose your own adventure and interpretation here. I think this boils down into two different ways that are, at least for me, scientifically, make the most sense, right, you can interpret this as you are experiencing, this is gonna get real Buddhist for a second bear with me, you're experiencing a relative reality. It's almost like you're in a pocket, if you will, as you experience relative reality. I'm the only one who experiences my reality the way that I do. And you could probably think of the inverse of that is like, you'd never see yourself the way other people do. Right? So like you exist in a completely different reality in someone else's head than you do in your own right. So there's, there's maybe there's a little bit of evidence towards that if you can approach the quandary that way. Ultimate Reality is this idea that everything that's ever going to happen has already happened, right? It's a very kind of multiverse theory that there's infinite versions of me and whether or not I had cereal for breakfast or didn't, right when that decision point happened, those two realities just kind of went happily off in their own dimension,

Steve Bisson: 12:47

the butterfly effect for some people would would say

Unknown: 12:50

absolutely right. So you could you could interpret everyone, as you pushed out as I'm experiencing a very small pocket of relative reality, ergo, if you can think about this, and Delores cannon is another name that I'll drop here, as somebody who speaks a lot about this type of material. Dolores Cannon suggests that you're the actor, director, screenwriter of your own play, and that you're forever changing the narrative to suit the lessons that you're here to learn the air go, all of the other actors are following your scripts. So you could think of it this way. One of the other ways people like to interpret Neville is and everyone is you pushed out is that anyone can only reflect back to me, what my own internal state is, what type of self narrative self monologue I'm putting out there. Right? So that, depending on which flavor you like, they're slightly different. Because one kind of suggests that, like, I'm the only player on the stage at any given time. And the other suggests like that might not be true, but what I'm putting out is absolutely being reflected back in needs. So kind of pick whatever flavor of that seems more feasible for you, or I think, as most people say, take what resonates and leave what doesn't. But that's kind of the two schools of thought to think about everyone is you pushed out?

Steve Bisson: 14:13

Well, I think it's also about how we interpret the world. Right? There's, I might have discussed this with people on my podcast, I don't remember but this is one of my favorite studies. They staged an accident and put people at a different corner for the front corners. And they said, Write down what you saw, in the most non subjective way, the most objective way how many stories matched up? And the answer is zero. Because we see the world the way we want, not because people are ill intended. But because we want to see the world in a certain way.

Unknown: 14:45

Correct. And there's a million different things that are coloring that for us, right? So

Steve Bisson: 14:50

trauma, absolutely. depression, schizophrenia, physical ailments, height, size,

Lisa Dennis: 14:58

right? Like all of that. those things,

Steve Bisson: 15:00

some of them are compromised the brain, nevermind the brain,

Unknown: 15:03

right? Some of those things are physical, some of those things are conscious, some of those things are subconscious. And I think if just to give some practical examples, before we get to maybe some more wild examples, we can even say things like, picture a time, when you were practicing for a job interview, and you really practice you were in the mirror, and you were having both sides of the conversation. Think about how many times the actual conversation played out exactly as you had rehearsed it, or you're driving somewhere and you're picturing, I'm going to get a spot, and it's going to be right here and how many times you you get there having kind of pre paved that for yourself, and you're like, oh, there's that spot, I knew that was going to be open, right? Or I like those things that you chalk up to intuition. I'm not saying there's no such thing as intuition. But I am saying when we do some neural pre paving for ourselves, a lot of times, we end up with these funky coincidences, where the thing that we envisioned is the thing that we actually lived through in some way, shape or form, right. And that's an idea of everyone, as you pushed out where I'm putting out that scenario, I'm feeling into that scenario, and then my outward world starts to reflect that back in at me, those are really great examples of how that works. But I could say things like, and, you know, maybe let's go here. So we can talk a little bit about the psychology of trauma. Let me put it this way, for familiar listeners, when you just think about a relationship that you've been in maybe where maybe you were with someone who had like anxious or avoidant attachment. And you started to, in your mind, feed that loop like, either they were being unfaithful, or they don't think I am xy, or Z attractive enough, smart enough, right? You start to build up the scaffolding of a narrative in your mind. And I'm not advocating for individuals not taking accountability for not treating others as well. But I am saying that a lot of times the thing that we're terrified of that we continue to run and rerun and rerun, that type of vibration can give our partners the sense of they just don't want to be here, I don't understand why they are pushing me away. Right? Although we perceive it as them pulling back. But in actuality, we're providing the push polarity through the incessant anxiety of that ongoing, self concept narrative.

Steve Bisson: 17:47

Right? Go ahead, I want to hear more. Because narrative is essentially what I find in therapy, once you figure out a person's narrative, you can help them tremendously, but unfortunately, I think that narrative is hard to break. For some people.

Unknown: 18:01

It is. And I think this goes back to what we were talking about with how many thoughts that we have that we don't bring awareness to because we are either projecting into the past. And we're and we're working through trauma or trauma bonds, right? We're working from that wounded part of us. And we've developed self concept narratives, to protect ourselves or maybe even in a better place to say, to protect that inner child or inner teenager, right? Like, we're working very hard to make sure that like, they don't I don't go through that again, right, that or we're projecting forward into the future, from a place of anxiety, what will happen? How do I, again, how do I protect myself from not going through that thing again, and we do things like, right, this, we do things like write ourselves small, or we say that we don't have worthiness for things, right? Or we tell ourselves constantly, like I keep going through the same pattern. This is, this is just my luck. This is how things are for me. And it's almost like we just keep digging that neural pathway deeper and deeper and deeper. And when you start to think about actively manifesting, which let's talk about that, scientifically, for what it is, it's actively accessing the quantum field, right, actively seeking a reality that exists where the thing you want or the person you want to be or whatever, whatever that reality is seeking that in the quantum field. To do that, correctly, you have to starve out that neural pathway that you've been digging for. God knows how long, right?

Steve Bisson: 19:44

And I'll give you my analogy of neural pathways before you go on. I'd rather talk about like a superhighway. So you created like if you have a trauma in your life XYZ trauma, no want to trigger anyone. What you've done is you've taken that highway, it was dirt at the Getting, but now it's nice and shiny. There's cement there as you put some asphalt on it. It's now seven lanes wide on both sides. And it's communicating effectively on both sides. So I don't talk about deepness, but rather like that superhighway that you've really frickin taken care of. Because if you lose that narrative, what you're left with you, but anyway, go ahead, I want to continue hearing.

Unknown: 20:21

This is a great, like a great analogy, though. Because what do you actually have to do? Right, you have to one be in the present moment. So the second, you start to go down that well paved, well maintained Road, which is the Think of it like water, it's the path of least resistance, it's where you're going to move to because you know, you know what it is, you know where it goes. And it's almost like driving home unconsciously, where you're just like, Oh, all right, 20 exits went by where was I write, that's the way you're going to move down that road of current self narrative, right? To bring yourself to the present, and say, Hey, wait a minute, wait a minute, I don't actually think that I don't actually think that I don't actually need to believe that's what's going to happen. I don't actually need to project into that place. If you can come back, even with simple self concept, recurrent narrative, like, I'm worthy, and I'm loved. And I'm enough, and you start to work that self concept, Lane, it is nothing. You're lucky if it's a horse trail, right when you start in on it. And I'll give you an interesting anecdote that you see from a lot of people when they start work with law of assumption or law of attraction. They'll say something like, and I hope that this is true for some of your viewers, I hope they have the aha moment here. Say, I don't know, I was doing self concept, assumptions. affirmations, right. I was doing those and some stuff works. And then it stops. Right? Yeah, because you have an I'm gonna go back to the brain science of it, right. But you have a neuro pathway that's constantly firing, firing, firing, I'm not worthy. I'm not enough. Everybody always hurts me. Everybody always leaves the whenever highway, whatever your bull pucky is, right? Whatever that is. It's going, going, going going. And then all of a sudden, in a brief gap, your affirmations grab and go, I'm worthy. I'm enough. And I'm abundant. And all of a sudden, like, the random check for your gap insurance shows up in the mail, and you're like, Oh, that's weird, like money out of nowhere. Alright, cool. I'm abundant. I'm abundant. I'm abundant. And then nothing happens. And it's like, Yeah, cuz you have years of this other thing firing off. It's not the past for the week will bringing yourself to the present moment constantly. And redirecting this other thing that goes without your direction is incredibly difficult and disciplined. In the same way daily meditation is, right in the same way that reconnecting through breath work is it is a it's a practice and a process.

Steve Bisson: 23:05

Right, in the spirituality in mental health, I kind of have that conversation with a whole lot of people because, you know, yeah, it took a while to get there. Oh, you're now saying you're worthy for one day? Well, that's going to fix 36 years of really fucked up. Right?

Unknown: 23:22

No, it's absolutely triple, right. And what you come by is starting to learn what triggers you. And this is like a hot button word. But like, listen, when you, if we go back to this thought of everyone, as you pushed out, you can begin to identify where you have wounding, by what do up around you. So what I would tell anybody looking at the law of assumption, or looking at the Law of Attraction is when people like do the mock up shit, and you're trying to be like, everyone has to be pushed out, like, why would they act this way towards me? Well, it's because you have a deep seated wound around that you have a narrative around that they're playing that energy out to you. It's a great way for you to go, Oh, I haven't worked on my shit around this thing, right? Like, oh, when people act this way, or that, or I have feelings of lack around money. And I always feel like I don't have enough money. Well, what was money? Like when you were growing up? Right? What did your parents tell you? Did they tell you how to work insanely hard? Did you grow up in scarcity? Are you running narratives that scarcity is the norm? Right? Right. Or, like they ghosted me they didn't text me back, right? And it's like, Hmm, and are you waiting? Like, are you waiting to feel enough and isn't like that, that dopamine that hit that that thing that they do that causes you to feel worthy or it's kind of this idea of like you still have to start knocking people out off of pedestals and start placing yourself kind of back there, right and right to do that, you have to dig in to your trauma, you have to because it, it will point out time and time again where you're still without fail.

Steve Bisson: 25:16

And when you say digging about trauma, it's not as easy as it sounds. Because now, one of the things that I've learned through work as a mental health counselor, but also in the spiritual side, there's such a narrative about trauma that comes from a lot of including I deserve this.

Unknown: 25:37

Yeah, well, I think what happens over time is you start to identify with the thing, right, and in identifying with the thing, you have to start, you know, it's it's vicious, but you have to rationalize the thing. That's part of surviving it. So if you are survivor of whatever, whatever type of abuse or whatever type of abandonment, or you know, whatever it is, and I'm speaking for myself as a trauma survivor, right, but you have to start to justify the thing or it's like, why else would it have happened? The idea that your trauma is like this tautology of it happened, because it happens is very hard for people to take in, too. Especially after a long time where you've started to identify with whatever that is right? It becomes part of the identity. And then you have to say, like, Well, I must have deserved it. Because whatever I was a bad kid, I was a bad lover. I was a guy I wasn't giving enough. I didn't do enough. I wasn't paying attention, whatever. Yeah, it's that's part of our survival response. And, again, if you pay close attention to the, what is it, that you're saying? I deserve it? Because it's like the inverse of what you should be working on? I deserved because I wasn't paying close enough attention. No, people weren't paying enough attention to you. Right. Right. It's very Darbo. Right? Like, very much so. And so. The interesting idea, I think, in the spiritual community, and in the new thought community is, is time, a construct is all time now. I like to think that if the present moment is kind of the only true moment of time that we experience, we could then say that when you slow down enough to say, I didn't Well, I'll just stay on that theme for a second. That inner child of me who says I must have deserved it, I didn't pay enough attention. Right? When I start to reparent, that part of myself with saying like, no, nobody paid enough attention to you. What do you want to say? Right? That type of it sounds I think that's hard work for people to go back and say, Okay, you weren't heard. I will listen, now. That's very shamanic journeying, right. But let's like I will listen now. When you listen. Now, past, you get through parented with current use empathy, current use toolkit, you're providing that space and love and support. The interesting thing is that you change the vibrational state of future you just write through that healing process, and you start to do things like, not operate out of fear or desperation. And when we talk about manifestation in general, that's super important. Our own ongoing self narrative is super important. And giving things like acceptance, allowance, forgiveness, and I'm talking about in at the self, right in the self, the because your being is only your being, and I'm getting that this whole vessel, right, but like what you actually are is only concerned with now it is a moment by moment process. Right.

Steve Bisson: 29:04

And I think that the problem is, I think when you have trauma, you're either in the past or in the future. So basically, when you're talking to someone, you're not done this for a few weeks, the therapy thing, I'm getting good at it. What I found with a lot of clients that I've had is that they're waiting for me sometimes when they've been through trauma, they're either waiting for me to buck up and do the same trauma they received, or oh, he's just setting me up for the future, and turning, and I've worked hard on telling people like if I you just live in the moment, just pay attention to what I'm saying in the moment, you'll see that I have no intention of the past or the future. I'm here in the moment. And that is such a hard thing to do. And I know it's a Buddhist thing to also think about we only have this moment, but at the end of the day, I think that what struggles we are as are emotional states is rarely the moment but something that has been conjured up from the past or worry about the

Unknown: 29:56

future. Yeah, and it holds us from You know the very thing I don't care what manner of teaching you ascribe to right the I think most major world religions spiritual Masters would tell you that the being the soul, the spirit, it's a vessel solely concerned with Love Love is and I'm talking about unconditional love and not talking romantic love. It's a feeling that exists out of the current moment. Whether you're reflecting that inward in love for the self, whether you're reflecting it outward towards your children, your fellow man, a beautiful day, right, that moment of connecting to the entire vibrational field around you. It is a very present moment, it doesn't exist anywhere out. I was just watching rom das very be here now. But he wasn't wrong. It's the only moment that matters in any type of even if you're perceiving time as linear, I have zero, I can't go back and change what I said, up till now on this podcast, I have no idea what I will say to the end of it, all I can do is stay right here focused in the now and give it my full attention and hope I get there. That's it. And that really does start to think about the quantum field, this idea that everything that you want exists on a wave, it's a point on a waveform, it's waiting to collapse into something physical that you can see, for those of you who want more science around this, I would tell you go look at Schrodinger cat, that's probably one of the easiest ways to think of this paradox, right? It is it is both this and not this until we observe it and it becomes this thing. That's everything you want from the house, the life, the abundance, the vacation that whatever it is. Problem is our own bullshit gets in the way, our own narrative of I'm not worthy, or I deserve something other than that, or somebody else deserves that. But not me, or it's very hard to we direct the President thought back to it doesn't have to be that way.

Steve Bisson: 32:13

Right. And I think that there's a few things that you said, you know, Schrodinger scat is a great analogy. And for those who want to google it, go Google it. If you want to watch a TV show that explains it fairly good, Big Bang theory does a great job. And the TV show numbers also did a fantastic job on that. Because there is a paradox there. That's kind of important to remember in regard to Schrodinger scat, however, one of the things that you really describe, and you talked about its progress is nonlinear. And I think that the other thing where people get stuck on the laws of assumption, and everything else is that, Oh, I'm getting better. So it's gotta go like this. And for those of you who see it, no, that's not how life is, you know, you get it's gonna be waves and waves, and maybe the wave is always going up. But there's gonna be downs among those waves.

Unknown: 33:02

Oh, my God, I think that's probably one of the best. It's like working out or any other process, right. But you know, for my own experience, yeah. And that's book in and of itself, but for my own experience in bringing about the versions of some of the relationships that I've wanted to surround myself with. It's almost like, if you were to look at crypto, you're looking at Shiva aina. And you're looking over the course of a day and it's like, Oh, my God, right. And then you zoom out a little bit, you look over the course of a week. And it's like doing this and then you look over the course of a year. And it's really doing this right. Sometimes you have to take a step back, I like to you know, and I use just because it's just for me, I use a secure notes app on my phone, but I like to do the letter technique where I write the diary entry. And so I will actually do this tonight as part of the new moon tonight in cancer because I am a cancer, I will do a technique tonight where I write a diary entry, I will write it from New Year's Eve, six months from now, I will write it as if everything I wanted came true, right? So I might actually include some stuff from earlier in the year that actually happened to kind of set my mind and set myself in that stage of rolling on. And then I will write from June to December. What happened, right and I'll keep my focus on the things that I want to experience. I keep those and what I find fascinating is when I go back to look at those like Is there stuff that didn't happen? Yeah, for sure. Absolutely. What I find amazing is if I'm true to repeating those narratives to myself for the next six months till I actually get to New Year's Eve, how much of it I will actually experience in the day to day world. Is it perfect? No but when I go back and look at those things, I'm always kind of gobsmacked by the like, should I wrote that and Either it or something very akin to it occurred. But I think that

Steve Bisson: 35:05

and there's your spirit animal right there.

Unknown: 35:08

That's right there. That's my buddy.

Steve Bisson: 35:11

But I think that that's the other part too is that we talked about what you're doing is fantastic. And I encourage people to do that. I mean, this is going to be out. It's coming out in beginning of July. So I hope people take that idea that you just talked about

Unknown: 35:23

every new moon. Yeah.

Steve Bisson: 35:26

Yeah, I aim for the small wins, you've known me long enough for that, like over that small week before I go get the big one. But I think that it's also kind of like where we got to be in life is that we want things to be the way we predictability to be perfect, or everything that's gonna go up is a linear process. I think that when you think about physics, you think about the spiritual life, you think about even what neville goddard talks about. There's no such thing as perfections. And we need to start worrying about more about how we can control our own narrative, and not worry so much about the perfection of it.

Unknown: 36:03

I think that not to jump to too many authors tonight. But I think that the alchemist gets into this quite a bit. And here's where I would say, boy, the catch 22 of being human is right, because I don't always think we're crystal clear on what we want. Right? We're I don't think we're always crystal clear on what we're actually asking the universe for. Or maybe to put it more succinctly, sometimes I think we start to go down the path of like, oh, shit, if I got what I want, then like, that's going to change my environment in a way that's going to make me really uncomfortable. Right? So our energy has like an ebb and flow. And so we see that ebb and flow right in the physical world. Paulo Coelho gets into this in the alchemist, when he says, when you want something with all of your heart, the universe conspires to make it so right. Well, that seems like a really simple thing to say. But how many times are we actually all in? And I'm the worst offender? Like, how many times are we actually 150%? All in? And if you're like, why does it all wobble? Like why does my progress to the thing wobble? Well, because your conviction wobbles, because your authentic belief wobbles your fear that when you get the thing it's either going to be so for your listeners who are tarot, savvy, I'm gonna have the tower moment, right? Everything's gonna shake down to the foundation to give me the thing that I just went through one of these I wanted for forever to move my environment. And I set about telling myself that I didn't know how it was going to happen, but that I would get there. Yeah, I got there. But it shook everything, I had pretty much down to the rubble, to get there to the point where like, I was having a nervous breakdown, like every week, you know, on the other side of that I am exactly where I asked to be this time last year. But was the progress very wobbly to get there? And did it do exactly what I thought and shake me down to the rubble? Yep. Yep. And, you know, that's the process.

Steve Bisson: 38:18

But I think it's also about how we, one of the things that I talk about when people like have these wishes for the future, a day, a month, a year, five years, whatever the case may be, it does not matter what it is. It can't be on a material side, per se. And what I mean by that is you wanted to change your environment. It didn't say in a bigger house than say, in a smaller house didn't say in the middle of Boston, or in the middle of North Dakota, didn't really matter in that way. But what you manifested is not a material process. I think that when you say people don't know what they want, I think that people don't know how to express non material needs.

Unknown: 38:58

Well, I think people get caught up in so we'll go back around to Neville Goddard. Right, but I think people get caught up on the how, and Neville suggests that there's, the universe has an outcomes razor approach. right all the time, the quantum field has an Occam's Razor approach. So he describes what he calls the bridge of incidents, which is, to us seemingly randomized events that in hindsight, you could look back and say, led you to the thing. Human beings tend to get real caught up in that we want our fingers in the house. We really want our fingers in the hand we want to dictate the house. What's wild when you get into reading some of Nevels material and people who gave testimonials kind of based on his his teachings are people who would say things like, I didn't know I had whatever a great uncle in Russia who died and left me his estate there's no there's no way I never heard of that guy right or you Think there's like, I think one of my favorites is a woman who ended up like no car, and she's about to have no house and no job. And she ran into somebody from high school, basically kind of telling him her sob story. He had lunch with their mutual friend from high school. That guy was like a multimillionaire at the time in 1930s, New York heard about this, he had had a huge crush on her in high school, was like, Oh, my God, she's not doing well. And he set her up with with a trust fund, out of the blue, right, and I think at the time was, like,$2,500 a month, which is, this is like in the 30s. And that's the real amount of money, right? And so it's this idea of, if you start to have the universe, and you start to put the parameters on, like, it's gotta be like this, it's got to be like that it needs to be this house. And it's not that it won't happen. But like, think of how many other twists, turns, can't go this way. Can't go that way. Because you're dictating the how and every time you dictate the how, if we're going back to the quantum field, that vibrational field where things need to collapse into an observable event, every time you put another parameter on the how, let's say there were 10 to the 10th power ways you could have gotten there with an open field where you said, I don't care, it just needs the end, I just want the end. And I don't care how there's 10 to the 10 fold ways that it can get there. When you start saying, Well, this is the end, but it needs to whatever it needs to have a burgundy car. Well now maybe it's like 10 to the fifth that you could get there, right? Because that other probability matrix doesn't involve that. And then maybe a while yeah, and then it also has to involve my stepbrother, you know, Pete from Terre Haute, and then it's like, oh, okay, well, now it's 10 to one because, right, right, like, that's so oddly specific to get you there. So what I would encourage people to do is exactly what what you're talking about my situation is get into the feeling of getting to the feeling of the person who has whatever the thing is the end state, and by the way, the n state is almost never money. Okay? Just gonna throw that out there. Money is a means to something that you want. Money is a means to things like freedom, or independence, or security. So I would tell you, if you're thinking, I need more money, why do you start you gotta like six sigma that shit and start asking yourself five why's right, like, why do you want to make because it makes you feel secure? Why do you need to feel secure, alright, because right, and then think about the version of you that feels secure, whether it's job security, right? Whether it's a feeling of peace and prosperity for your family, you want to lean into that feeling. And think, act and tell a narrative as if you are that person with that thing and sit with that feeling. For those of you who are like I can't meditate, I don't like to do the ohms I don't like to chant and I like to write, okay, a great meditation for you is to have a picture of this, this is a great meditation for you. Picture you telling your best friends about your life with that thing that you want, as if you have it. Today. You're talking with your bestie like you're on the phone, you're gonna talk that through. You don't necessarily need to say how but you're gonna need to say things like it love the house that we're in. It's perfect. I wake up every morning, I have my coffee in the kitchen. I feel so relaxed, right? Like it's a beautiful view. I feel content here. Feel into that state. That's the vibrational thing that that you want and how you got there doesn't matter you already have it doesn't matter how you got let go of that. Let the physics do it for you. Like oh,

Steve Bisson: 43:47

oh, feeling that state is so important too. And I think that I like those words that you put feel in that state because one of the things that you've known me long enough, one of my hardest things my first language is French. And I always find it really hard in I particularly in American culture. And yes, here I'm American now so I can complain all I want apparently. When I tell people I love them. To me, it's not like a weird love, like what people think about in other ways. I say this to my clients all the time. I mean, there's no word for like, in French. There's nothing. So for me love is just I love someone.

Unknown: 44:27

I guess you could say like you should keep right I guess that's as close as you might might get right. But like, you're right. You the door for everything or M for everything. Absolutely.

Steve Bisson: 44:40

And I've learned that for me. One of the things that really plays into the narrative, the feeling the state is that I end up talking to people and I go okay, can't say love because it's going to be misinterpreted. And I'm not talking about clients. I'm talking about people day to day. And until I have that like listen, I don't have a word for like in French and I don't know how to how have a say like, I mean, it's a stupidest word in the world, in my opinion in that way. So I think once I feel that state, and I just say like, and I've said to my clients many times, I love them. And yes, for those of you who think that's weird, I don't give a shit. I think that what I've learned is that it also helps heal when you're using the right words with people.

Unknown: 45:21

I mean, this is very Americanized, I think, I think we're sold from a very this is this is social programming on my social engineering, I think we're sold a bill of goods around love from an early age in the States, right? That love is only romantic love. And if there's one thing that everything that I've read, from amazing channelings, two amazing interpretations of spiritual books, it's that love is what you are, period. And end of story at the end of you, you came from it, when you came here, you're going back to it, when you leave here, you're here for the good time, not for the long time, right. And what you actually are, is a being of endless love that is essentially recording data. For a much larger system, you are just a small piece of that system experiencing data for a short period of time. And when you go back, you will bring it lovingly back to whatever you want to call it God source the universe or whatever you want to call it. We're sold a romanticized bill of goods around love. And I think that's enhanced. Me personally, I'm soapboxing. I think it's on purpose to distract us from the idea that there should be a huge campaign right now on Earth to just normalize doing things like telling your friends that you love them, telling them, I have two co workers that I absolutely say love you, too. And I hang up casual conversations with because we've been co workers for five years. And I think of them as friends and I love them, I would be heartbroken if anything happened to them. We need to get better at just recognizing the fact that what if everybody actually is us pushed out? And what if the only way to actually capitalize that on a way that makes sense and as humanitarian is to recognize that like, unconditional love doesn't mean don't have boundaries. Unconditional Love doesn't mean? Let people treat you like shit. Unconditional Love, means that you're operating from a place where you've got your best interests at heart, first and foremost. And then after you're done filling that cup, you blossom into service for others from that universal love, right? That doesn't mean don't feel your own cup first, by the way, especially if you're out there listening and you identify as an empath this first than that. Right? That's first than that.

Steve Bisson: 47:45

But I think that that's, that's kind of where I wanted to go with that, that thought process of love. Because love is not, you know, when you're thinking about assumptions, and you're thinking about neurology and all that, if you don't distribute love, so to speak, how to hell are you going to get anywhere in life. And to me on a spiritual standpoint, I'd rather say I love my clients, and get whatever people get little freaked out, I kind of explained it for those who freak out, then have to worry about if the word is going to be misinterpreted and stuff like that. Because if you give out love, you will receive love. And that's kind of like the spiritual process and the spiritual practice that I take on a day to day basis. You talk about your friends, I got friends that I've loved for years, I have clients that I love, I have colleagues that I love. And I think that once you kind of like have that notion of love, you can only attract that love when you talk about this concept of what you attract back to in the law of attraction.

Unknown: 48:45

That's right. And for those who want more scientific proof, and his name has been a state beings, Japanese, to Japanese scientists who did experiments with water and water holding data and the crystallin structures that were built up in water that were exposed to vibrational work meaning people either thinking experiencing or speaking words of affection, love acceptance over water, and then people who were doing things like your piece of worthless shit over water. And what he would do is freeze those two samples and look at the crystalline structures of what the data did. It's reproducible. You could do it if you had a microscope and a freezer, you could absolutely do this experiment the water that holds that data of the vibrational state of I Love You makes beautiful symmetrical crystal and structures they look very much like sacred geometry and the water that has that vibration of like yeah, you you are worthless, right has very asymmetrical fractured. We would say it's not artistically palatable to us right it just it doesn't sit well with us like our Our sense of aesthetics. So there's put in play. There's plenty of studies plants around this. But I would probably suggest that because plants and humans are so much water.

Steve Bisson: 50:11

And the beauty of doing a podcast is I can go on Google while you're talking. And his name is masa, who? Modi?

Unknown: 50:19

That is correct. Thank you for that keeping me honest. There is

Steve Bisson: 50:24

give credit where credit is due very important to me,

Unknown: 50:26

you need to look at for those on your listener base who are like, I'm interested in that, please go look at the study that he did. And do look at the structures I think you can find pictures, he had a bunch of Buddhist monks pray over moving water coming under a bridge. And that water in particular looked incredible as far as crystal and structure goes. And you may be saying to yourself, this this this law of assumption, it will lead you down the pathway of like, is that how prayer works? Yes. Is that how faith healing works? Yes. Is that how the placebo effect works? Yes. Right. So there's a lot of science science and you know, to some to some respects, pseudoscience that will dovetail here, I think what, what I'd like for your listeners to really think about is if you want to create those narratives for the things that you want, and the person that you want to be, you will need to go do the trauma work, because it will continue to resurface. And it will continue to sabotage all of your good intentions, you need to figure out what makes you triggered bitch, and go deal with it. And for me, personally, that's been the journey of I'd say the last two years, I think I was upfront with this on Wrestling podcast, but I've been in therapy for a long time that has been the focus of my therapy is like, where do I keep getting triggered, because those are the pieces of me I need to dig really deep with and validate, and learn to recognize that they don't derail me from the inner work, the spiritual work that I'm doing and the things that I want to experience as a spiritual person.

Steve Bisson: 52:11

And I think that with trauma work with there's a few things I want to mention, because when we talk about the spirituality of it, trauma is stored in a certain way in our brain. And if you really work on your trauma, you can change the way it's stored. And I tell people that they like you're, you're crazy, and I've done it and certainly give shout out to my therapist, Joe, who's helped me tremendously with that. You can change how you store it doesn't mean that the the memory is not that like it's the same, it's the same memory, but you can change how you store it so that you can live through it and actually be okay with the process of it, number one. Number two, I think that with trauma, what are the things that we need to work on as a community in general, I don't get to decide to tell a Lisa, this is not trauma, but that is and you don't get to say Hey, Steve, this is trauma. And this is not trauma is trauma. And we're not there to judge it. And I think that on a spiritual standpoint, when we talk about everything that we've talked about. The hardest part is that a lot of people like Well, I wasn't a refugee, stuck in a truck in Texas, therefore I'm my trauma is not valid. No, it's not about validity. It's about what it did to you and how you're going to store and how you're going to process it. And I think there's a lot of people who struggle with that. And so losing that and then I think me and you have had a private conversation about this was we lose our trauma, do we lose our identity, which is even more? Yes, to

Unknown: 53:35

a certain extent. You're gonna rebuild a lot of yourself from scratch it no matter what path you want to go down in the spiritual community, whether whether you're into law of assumption, law of attraction, whether you're into bhakti yoga, whether you're into the tower, Dallas, no matter what your flavor is, whether you're witchcraft, whatever it is, which is just spicy psychology anyway, in my opinion, but what do you know, no matter what your flavor is, you will inevitably something will bring you to a dark night of the soul something inevitably brings us to the point where our ego what we consider ourselves to be gets shaken down enough where you don't have many choices, you could analyze maybe that's where I was, that's what brought me into therapy several years ago, you could decide to go balls to the wall with spirituality, that's cool too. But as you learn to heal from trauma, you'll need to kind of think about All right, well without my trauma, you know, I'm not I'm saying trauma will take you can see me if you're not watching but you know, just think of a big big circle that represents your trauma right? And that's that's a space let's say, the boundaries of your of yourself and maybe today trauma fills that all the way to the to the boundaries and As you start to heal it, I'm not saying it ever goes away, but it becomes a very small compartment of that boundary. And then you have all this space around it. And what is that, once that trauma becomes this very small part of the identity, then what is this other thing, cool thing is, is that if we're present and kind of tying it off, I guess, but if you're present, if you're present with the self, if you start to panic and go down, that old narrative of worthiness, or abandonment, or whatever, it's like going back to like booze or drugs or gambling. But if you start to go back to that thing that felt good, because it was what you knew, stopping that, and going back to I am worthy, and I'm an individual who is loved and loves and is abundant, and who is chosen and prioritized. And that's the narrative that I choose to tell for myself and building practices around the things that you can do for yourself that make you feel that way, whether that's going outside and walking around barefoot, picking yourself a good meal, sitting down with a good book, taking what my best friend and I refer to as the hot bitch bath, right, which means like the bath bombs going into candles are getting lit, I might be pouring a glass of Rose, I don't know, like, I'm essentially cancer now taking care of the vessel, right? Whatever that is that validates those feelings. And you're validating those feelings for you. You're not going out to seek that right? You're saying like, what am I going to do? For me that reinforces those feelings of being loved, worthy, abundant, chosen, prioritize, you can create that vibrational state in yourself by giving that thing to yourself. It's just being cognizant of when the train of thought starts to go this way, rein it back into the present moment and giving yourself that gift of whatever is going to reinforce what you want in life.

Steve Bisson: 57:04

And the thing I wanted to say was that trauma that you described and how it empties once you start doing the process, it's not empty space, it's new opportunities, which you can fill with whatever the hell you want. And I think I think that that's kind of like a great way for us to kind of like wrap it up here because it's already been an hour. Be Lisa can probably talk for another two hours about this. But interestingly enough, when we were supposed to originally record this, you had COVID. And this time, it's my turn.

Unknown: 57:33

Now you have the Rona, I know. She's just she's just the village by this Rona. Going around.

Steve Bisson: 57:40

And I would love to continue your conversation. But I also know that the attention span of most human beings and our number two, I'm fading, I'm feeling myself fade. So I'm just going to call it what it is. I'm fading.

Unknown: 57:53

You need to give yourself the gift of that sleep.

Steve Bisson: 57:56

Yeah, no kidding. So I want to thank you again, you're the number one showed the first season by far. Thank you. That's awesome. Just gives you something else to aim for for season five, which we're in right now. And so but I wanted to thank you well, I've known you for a long time and the richness of our relationship is always something that I've absolutely loved. And I really love you and appreciate you and I want to make sure I said that.

Unknown: 58:20

Yeah, I love you and appreciate you too very, very much and that you know for those we talked about a bunch of stuff today. Neville Goddard. Abraham Hicks what else the alchemist was the Dolores Cannon does it be the four

Steve Bisson: 58:36

and I still think that going to the muscle really emoti to look at those studies

Unknown: 58:42

do you go look at the water good do you go look at the Crystal instructors have influenced data inside water it is an amazing study and and if you're scientific minded I think will be something that will truly interest you. Yeah good Kala

Steve Bisson: 58:56

and I think that for me when you you know everyone has something to plug you're plugging other authors so beautiful.

Unknown: 59:02

Yeah, sorry. There is a there's also an equally lovely author on the pod today. It's not me.

Steve Bisson: 59:10

Thank you. But I also think that people ever want to go on tick tock they perhaps could find you.

Unknown: 59:15

They could they could find me at Queen of Cups Taro, double Deuce queen of cups Taro 22. On tick tock, I do provide taro and from time to time some self deprecating phonies over there but you can find me there and Instagram queen of cups Tarot 22, where I do provide Tara insights to folks who are looking to connect.

Steve Bisson: 59:38

I recommend it so I want to make sure we plug that to

Unknown: 59:41

thank you for that. I'll talk to you soon. Yep, adios.

Steve Bisson: 59:46

Well, this concludes episode 56 Finding your way through therapy. Lisa Dennis, thank you so much. That was a great conversation. Really like talking about Abraham Hicks and Neville Goddard? We talked about the alchemist talking about a lot of different stuff, so I hope you enjoyed it too. Episode 57 will be Stephanie Simpson Stephanie is a friend of a friend, who I'm hoping that we're gonna have a great conversation about a bunch of different stuff. But more importantly, we're going to talk about conscious leadership among other things and foreign leadership, as well as her experience in therapy. So I'm looking forward to that. Please like, subscribe or follow this podcast on your favorite platform. A glowing review is always helpful. And as a reminder, this podcast is for information, educational, and entertainment purposes. If you're struggling with a mental health or substance abuse issue, please reach out to a professional counselor or therapist for consultation.