Finding Your Way Through Therapy
Join Steve Bisson, LMHC as he unravels the complexities of therapy and counseling. Engage in straightforward dialogues, enriched with insights from special guests sharing a like-minded perspective. Each episode presents valuable, easy-to-digest information designed to help you perceive therapy, and those who partake in it, in a grounding, relatable manner.
Finding Your Way Through Therapy
E.158 Balancing Act: A Therapist's Guide to Self-Care and Personal Well-Being
Have you ever wondered how therapists take care of their own mental health while supporting others through theirs? Today, I share my personal journey through the landscape of self-care, especially during the pandemic. I'll reveal the challenges I've faced in balancing professional responsibilities with personal well-being and how scheduling vacations in advance, a strategy taught by my business coach has been a game-changer. Discover how Julie Herres's book, "Profit First for Therapists," has shed light on the financial anxieties that many of us face, and how understanding these can help us better serve our clients while taking care of ourselves.
Self-care isn't just about routine tasks; it's about finding activities that bring you joy and relaxation. From gardening and lawn care to more unconventional hobbies like yodeling, I discuss how personal hobbies can serve as effective self-care practices. I'll also share my exciting plan to take nine weeks off, during which time I'll feature some of our favorite past episodes. As we gear up for the summer holidays, join me in celebrating Canada Day and the 4th of July.
While we wrap up with holiday wishes, remember the importance of seeking professional help for mental health or substance abuse issues—call 988 if you're in crisis in the United States or Canada.
Hi and welcome to Finding your Way Through Therapy. A proud member of the PsychCraft Network, the goal of this podcast is to demystify therapy, what can happen in therapy and the wide array of conversations you can have in and about therapy Through personal experiences. Guests will talk about therapy, their experiences with it and how psychology and therapy are present in many places in their lives, with lots of authenticity and a touch of humor. Here is your host, steve Bisson.
Speaker 2:Alors, encore merci Again. Thank you, and welcome to episode 158 of Finding your Way Through Therapy. If you haven't listened to episode 157 yet, go listen to it. Courtney Romanowski, our resident guest host, had Ben Herman. It's a great interview. Go listen to it. I really enjoyed it myself. You know it's always interesting to listen to it afterwards when you have a guest host, but I really enjoyed it and I hope you did too. But episode 158, you know this is interesting, so I want to share.
Speaker 2:This is going to be a very personal one, because I want to share a little more. Yeah, I'll talk about my business. Yes, I'll talk about podcasts, but I want to humanize a few things. I want to talk about self-care, I want to talk about my reasons for the summer, a couple of things that happened recently, and I want you to see a therapist for who he is a human being. So, of course, you're going to hear me plug something here. So please listen to this. All summer long there's better discounts. So please sign up for freeai. But here is a little tidbit from them. And while it's me talking, but please listen to this GetFreeai yes, you've heard me talk about it previously in other episodes, but I'm going to talk about it again, because GetFreeai is just a great service.
Speaker 2:Imagine being able to pay attention to your clients all the time, instead of writing notes and making sure that the note's going to sound good and how are you going to write that note, and things like that. Getfreeai liberates you from making sure that you're writing what the client is saying, because it is keeping track of what you're saying and will create, after the end of every session, a progress note. But it goes above and beyond that. Not only does it create a progress note, it also gives you suggestions for goals, gives you even a mental status if you've asked questions around that, as well as being able to write a letter for your client to know what you talked about. So that's the great, great thing. It saves me time, it saves me a lot of aggravation and it just speeds up the progress note process so well. And for $99 a month. I know that that's nothing. That's worth my time, that's worth my money. You know, the best part of it too is that if you want to go and put in the code Steve50 when you get the service at the checkout code is Steve50. You get $50 off your first month, and if you get a whole year, you save a whole 10% for the whole year. So, again, steve50 at checkout for getfreeai will get you $50 off for the first month and, like I said, get a full year, get 10 off, get freed from writing notes, get freed from always scribbling while you're talking to a client and just paying attention to your client. So they win out, you win out, everybody wins, and I think that this is the greatest thing. And if you're up to a point where you got to change the treatment plan, well, the goals are generated for you. So get freeai code code STEVE50 to save $50 on your first month. Well, welcome back.
Speaker 2:And so you know, I've been pondering what I'm going to talk about because I wanted to talk about self-care. I've done that before. Self-care is so important to me and I'll tell you that the self-care is always something that has been difficult, ultimately, for most therapists. You know, reading Julie Hare's shout out. She's on the Psychcraft Network too, so go listen to some of those shows. But Julie has a great book called Profit First for Therapists, and it's really. You know, I actually have been browsing it for a while now. I'm just actually sitting down and listening to it and it talks about all the anxiety. You know, mike, who wrote the Profit First book, mike and I can't pronounce Mike's name talked about how therapists get nervous about different things and mostly money. You know I've been blessed in some ways, not saying that I'm going to ever cry poor and I'm never going to cry rich, but I'm okay, you know, and I'm happy about that. But you know the the part that's really hard for me is to say I'm going to take a week off here and there.
Speaker 2:I'd like to say that in the last three to five years, I think it got significantly better, depending on the seasons, depending on the time. I think that about uh, I want to say three years ago, if you listen to my Instagram this little before my podcast, I shared how I needed to do. I was just being there for everyone during the pandemic and I forgot to be there for me and I had to take some time off because I was not. I was struggling really deeply and for those of you who don't understand, for XYZ reasons, that's okay. But you know, therapists want to be there for their clients. We care for our clients. If you have a therapist that sees you as a number, probably not the right therapist for you. He or she probably is in the wrong profession or day, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:I think that what I've learned to do is to really set some vacations on like it in advance. My business coach a few years ago taught me that Shout out to Amy Toomer, who has been on this show before and I learned to do that. Do I do it all the time? Of course not. So I took a week out in May. I had not taken real vacation. I was on vacation in February with my daughters and my girlfriend, but I hadn't really taken any vacation. I forced myself to take vacation in May because I was really tired.
Speaker 2:You know, one of the things that I've shared with people is that this I share with my clients. So if you think this is a podcast episode that no one's ever heard, sorry, some of this has been heard, but one of my measurements for self-care is this All my clients right now blessed, lucky, attracted it, whatever your belief system is on this All my clients, I really enjoy all of them, for different reasons, obviously, from one to another, and, yeah, they all have real problems and they're all working on them, but I really enjoy all my clients and the first week of May, someone showed up, whoever it was, and this is not an attack on them, and my clients know that too. They show someone opened the door. I wasn wasn't there, I can't see who comes in, but the first thought I had is like they're here. And when I get to that point I know I need vacation and so I'm still not great at planning them ahead. But I do know my signs of burnout. Um, and it wasn't right now because of anything my clients did. So you know, for those of you like, oh, maybe it's his clients, no, it's my own volition.
Speaker 2:Basically, I'm not being careful at taking care of me, and that's one of the things therapists really struggle with. I push it with my clients, and my clients know how important it is and I ask them to take some time off. Go. You know. I even tell them get a new hobby, go yodel, go underwater basket weaving are my two go-tos. But ultimately, hobby go yodel, go underwater basket weaving or my two go-to's, but ultimately it doesn't matter what you do, as long as you do something you enjoy. And self-care is exactly that doing something for you.
Speaker 2:You know, I think self-care is always misunderstood. What I hear sometimes from self-care. Is that people telling me well, you know, I went to get a good haircut, or I, I got my nails done. Is that maintenance or is that self-care? And to me, that for some people that's maintenance, that's not self-care. Me getting my nails done, is that maintenance or is that self-care? And to me, for some people that's maintenance, that's not self-care. Me getting my nails done, that's self-care.
Speaker 2:I never get my nails done. I don't care if they're done, but if I do them, that'll be fine If I get this beard trim. So if you go to YouTube, it's not too bad right now, but it does get a little scruffy sometimes, as my girlfriend notes. But if I go get it done, is it really self-care? Is it part of my day-to-day stuff? I have two hernias. It's not a hernia, it's like whatever. I have bad discs in my back. So go for massages anywhere, anywhere from four to six weeks and sometimes earlier if it's really painful. People like oh, that's great self-care. No, that's maintenance for me, because I can't function without those. Literally I have a lot of back pain.
Speaker 2:So you know I like to educate people in self-care that it's something that you do just for you. You can do it with other people, like people who go and play sports. You know, I do have clients who play team sports, whether it's soccer or football or basketball or even hockey, and you'll be like, oh well, it's to be with other people, yeah, but even if all those people weren't there, would you still do it? Yes, that's self-care, that's something you enjoy, right, and if the rink was empty and you pick up the puck and you shade it not me, but for people who do that that'd be fine. Finding one person with faster football width, that's something I used to do Shoulder again, I complaining here but ultimately it's finding things that you enjoy and you're doing for you. You're not doing it to please other people, you're doing them for you.
Speaker 2:My best self-care is to go play in my garden, literally, as I record, this Father's Day was a couple of days ago and my kids asked me oh, what do you want to do? We don't really have anything planned for, you know, late morning, early afternoon, they're like honestly, I want to go play in my garden. So I take out the rocks, I clean up the weeds, I water it, I just clean it up, everything that needs to be done. That's fun for me, and cutting my lawn is fun for me. I'll probably never outsource that. I enjoy that, and that's what I mean about self-care.
Speaker 2:Self-care is also not something that you know everyone would be like this is self-care. Well, for me, doing my lawn is self-care. I enjoy it. I get out of my head. I'm really just focusing on the lawn. Yeah, I put on my earbuds, listen to music, but ultimately I'm not. It's fun, it's my way of detaching. I check my lawn. I do it. Well, for those who have known me or have listened to this before, I work my ass off on my lawn, I really, really like my lawn. So, um, and I have a few people I know who do that, but you know that's a self-care thing, so I hope that helps around self-care.
Speaker 2:And the self-care I'm doing right now is I'm going to be taking about. I'm looking at my schedule right now one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine weeks off. I'm gonna take nine weeks off starting next episode. Uh, don't worry. What I'm going to do is I'm going to put my favorite episodes as well as the ones that are most popular, and I'm going to start off with Hayden from the beginning of the year, hayden, you know who does the on-site in Massachusetts and helps first responders, and we had a great conversation on two episodes.
Speaker 2:You know I'm going to put an episode with Courtney. I'm going to put in a few solo episodes. You know I'm going to put an episode with Courtney. I'm going to put in a few solo episodes. I think Mental Men are going there. I think Gina Moffa her book is going to be in there Lisa Muster, a good friend of mine, and Brad Mastrangelo, who is a friend of mine but also one hell of a comic. And yeah, when you hear the replay it's going to be promoting something that's already passed, but his CD is still out, so you can go get it. Brian Mastrangelo is a very funny guy, understands.
Speaker 2:Mental health is about laughing. Mental health is about whatever helps people change their minds into where they're going. So you know I'm going to put those up for the next nine weeks. It's the first time I've done that. I think I've explained that on my anniversary episode, but for those of you who might've missed it, you can go and listen to it. But the quick answer is I haven't taken time off this um for my podcast and this year and recording what ends up, this being episode number 26,. All original stuff is really exhausting and it can be tiring. You know I I I'm going to break a wall for you.
Speaker 2:Not only am I a podcaster, but I'm also someone who is a therapist, who practices that. Now I have an intern Shout out, larissa James. She's my new intern. If you have any referrals, let me know. But Larissa is my first private practice intern and you know we're working through that. You know I have a member of my someone in my office that's leaving. So I'm going to have some reorganization to do and I also have a life outside of work and what I do for that, nevermind the research for first responders and other stuff that I do for them. You know, ultimately what I have is a lot of things going on in my personal life.
Speaker 2:I love my girls You've heard me mention this in my podcast all the time and you know my 16 and soon to be 14 she'll turn 14 this summer they still want to spend time with me and that means the world to me, maybe some doing something right as a father. But yeah, you know, we you know again, as we record this went to the beach today. They're both kind of lobster-ish. I put on a lot of sunscreen. So if you go to YouTube you can see it. If not, I'm red as my shirt. So go ahead and go check it out. Go check out my YouTube. And you know I want to take vacation. I'm going to go up to Montreal. I haven't been up in six months. It really breaks my heart. Just didn't have time because of soccer, and that's another breaking heart thing.
Speaker 2:Last week again, again. Time frame is not important if you're listening to this episode, but you know, as I record, this last week was my last game that I coached. I kept it together throughout the game. Uh, despite some of the difficulties we had, I got pissed off at a couple of people, but not my team, uh, not the referees, but and he was my last one and I wanted to make it special it's the first time in all the years I've coached. I told the girls I'm like you're not playing, you're playing for me. For once. I really want this game. And we played a team that has a lot of talent. We were a better team and we tied one to one. So you're going to say, well, that's not a better team. No, but we played as a team and we're definitely a better team than most teams and that's always been my goal as a coach, not a therapist, but as a therapist too, I guess. But that's the stuff that I kept it together.
Speaker 2:When I finished I told them how much I'm going to miss them. That's when I broke down and most of them looked at me like I had seven heads and or seven eyes Right. But ultimately I think it's because you know, I really get attached to these girls. These girls mean the world to me. These girls have been. You know, I've some of my son grow up and because we cover two towns, I think about half of them I'll never see again. Maybe I'll see him in passing, hopefully.
Speaker 2:So you know, help them grow, work on their independence, work on their strengths, making sure no one affects them but them, and then learning to really just believe in themselves. And when you work as a team we can do anything. And I just I hope I got that through to them I don't can't name their name. Well, I could name their names but at the same time I don't want to because that's their stuff. They may not want to hear their name on the podcast and I respect that. But shout out to the Milford Hopedale Sharks meant the world to me to coach you guys for five years. Most of you and some of you I coached even before that and I coach my older daughter and I really miss it. You know I'm doing my grief process around that Right now I'm okay.
Speaker 2:Might change in a couple minutes, might change in a couple hours, but that was a lot of change for me, as much as I'm looking forward to having my time to myself, which is not going to last long, because you know, in the town where my oldest daughter plays, they want me to be part of the booster club and then my other daughter, who's going to a technical school, probably will want, you know, want me to be participating through something there. So I'm going to be doing that. But you know my kids are just my world and you know I'm not the best father in the world, not the worst father in the world, I'm somewhere in between. But I really care about my girls and you know this is summer is for them.
Speaker 2:I don't want to be recording a podcast in the middle of the summer just because I need to fill out these times and I figured my audience would understand. And if they don't, I mean they got a hundred and let's see 158 episodes really 175 episodes before that that they can go and listen to. So it's going to be my kids going to Montreal spending time with my girlfriend. We're going to try to get a trip in or two, and I'll get to do that and then again play in my garden, cut my lawn and I know that sounds weird for those who don't live in the Northeast and but yeah, that's just a reality just for the summer. We don't live in the northeast and but yeah, that's just a reality just for the summer. We don't get to do it a whole lot after that. But yeah, and so that's my summer and I don't know exactly what's going to happen, but that's part of what I'm going to do.
Speaker 2:As far as the others, you know a couple more things. The group for my first responders will continue throughout the summer really enjoyed it so far. I've had good conversations about different things and that's the bottom line. I really enjoy that. Gambit Counseling continues to grow and we're definitely working on that, and I told you about my interns.
Speaker 2:So again, I didn't rehearse this, I just have the episodes I was up to. I didn't even think I'd go that long about self-care actually. But at the end of the day, I want to wish everyone a happy summer, a safe summer. Do what's right for you, make sure you have a good time, take care of yourself, take care of your kids If you have any kids. If you don't have kids, spend time with your friends, spend time with your family and if you haven't none of that, spend your time listening to my podcast, and then maybe you'll learn a thing or two. But at the end of the day, I just want to wish you a happy summer.
Speaker 2:We'll be back with original episodes starting september 4th I'm not quite sure which one. I have a couple things lined up end of august to record when my kids are back in school, but I don't know who it's going to be. But I got a few things already planned and I plan to do probably original episodes, probably till the end to middle December, when you know I take another hiatus for the holidays, but it'll be not really a hiatus. I think there's going to be a lot of new stuff and very cool stuff, and if you want to hear anything in particular about this in this podcast, just let me know, just email me. There's a text me box now, if you go to the episode notes whether it's Apple, podcast, spotify, amazon or YouTube there's a place where you can just click and send me a message. So please do so if you want to, if you have any particular subjects you want me to talk about.
Speaker 2:So I hope you enjoy your safe holiday, safe summer. I hope you enjoy your safe holiday, safe summer. And which is the first one in order. Then it's a happy Canada Day for my English Canadian friends, as well as a happy 4th of July for my American friends. I'm proud to be all three and I don't know, I'll be perfectly honest, I'll probably celebrate a little more, but I'm working. So here goes the puts in. Can't find good smoked meat around here, so I'll probably have to wait till I go up there. But enjoy the summer and I will see you in September, guys.
Speaker 1:Please like, subscribe and follow this podcast on your favorite platform. A glowing review is always helpful and, as a reminder, this podcast is for informational, educational and entertainment purposes only. If you're struggling with a mental health or substance abuse issue, please reach out to a professional counselor for consultation. If you are in a mental health crisis, call 988 for assistance. This number is available in the United States and Canada.
