Resilience Development in Action

E.205 Healing Heroes: Trauma, Addiction, and Recovery

• Steve Bisson, Charlie Powell • Season 12 • Episode 205

Share episode

Send us a text

The walls we build to protect ourselves from trauma can become our prisons. This powerful truth emerges as Dr. Charlie Powell returns to share groundbreaking developments with his "Healing Heroes: No Mind Left Behind" documentary, now evolving from a television series into a theatrical release scheduled for November 11th.

Charlie takes us deep into the intricate relationship between PTSD and addiction, revealing how these conditions often share the same root causes. "Most cases of PTSD don't start in adulthood," he explains, sharing his personal revelation that despite decades in military service and trauma medicine, some of his most significant healing came from addressing a childhood near-drowning experience. This perspective shatters conventional understanding of trauma, suggesting that many of our adult struggles trace back to moments where life came at us "too fast, too much, and too soon."

The conversation ventures into uncomfortable but vital territory as Charlie and Steve discuss how trauma survivors' silence impacts relationships. "The silence that you put your partner through," Steve notes, "may not seem like verbal abuse or trauma, but it is." Charlie takes this further with a provocative comparison: this withdrawal can be as damaging as infidelity, representing a loss of faith in the partner's ability to handle the truth of your experience.

Most powerfully, Charlie shares his initial reluctance and eventual decision to make his personal story central to the documentary. "People think vulnerability is a weakness. It's not. It's a strength," he explains, challenging the stigma that keeps many first responders and veterans from seeking help. This vulnerability has already resonated deeply—the documentary's first trailer garnered an astounding 4 million views in just three and a half days.

For anyone struggling with trauma's grip, this conversation offers not just insight but tangible hope. Charlie describes how interventions combining multiple healing modalities helped six veterans and first responders achieve transformative recovery in just ten days—freedom from both PTSD symptoms and associated addictions many had developed to cope. As Charlie puts it: "Challenge anybody out there—imagine the biggest accomplishments you've ever had in life and tell me which one was easy." Perhaps our greatest traumas, properly processed, can lead to our greatest growth.

Ready to see trauma recovery differently? Listen now, and watch for the new Healing Heroes trailer dropping this Memorial Day.


Here is the trailer for "Healing Heroes: No Mind Left Behind" Season 1: https://youtu.be/16bnQ7eVKKI?si=46VOPpo1fLq_WB9o

Freed.ai: We’ll Do Your SOAP Notes!
Freed AI converts conversations into SOAP note.Use code Steve50 for $50 off the 1st month!

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.

Support the show



YouTube Channel For The Podcast




Speaker 1:

Welcome to Resilience Development in Action, where strength meets strategy and courage to help you move forward. Each week, your host, steve Bisson, a therapist with over two decades of experience in the first responder community, brings you powerful conversations about resilience, growth and healing through trauma and grief. Whether you're navigating the complex journey of grief, processing trauma or seeking to build resilience in high-stress environments, this podcast is your trusted companion. From first responders facing daily challenges to emergency personnel managing critical situations, to leaders carrying the weight of difficult decisions, we're here to support your journey. Through authentic interviews, expert discussions and real-world experiences, we dive deep into the heart of human resilience. We explore crucial topics like trauma recovery, grief processing, stress management and emotional well-being. Our conversations bridge the gap between professional insight and practical application, offering you tools and strategies that work in the real world. Join us as we create a space where healing is possible, where grief finds understanding and where resilience becomes your foundation for growth. This is Resilience Development in Action with Steve Bisson.

Speaker 2:

I'll always change up those intros because I think it's important. Welcome to episode 205. If you haven't listened to episode 204, Beth Saldo was on. She had great stories. I hope you go back and listen to it. I really enjoyed talking to her. But yeah, we had my next guest on for episode 200. But because he has a very important project coming out and I'll let him talk about it during the interview. Charlie Powell is back and we're going to talk about Healing Heroes. We're going to talk about how it has evolved and where it's going to be, and I hope you enjoy the interview. And here it is.

Speaker 2:

Getfreeai. Yes, you've heard me talk about it previously in other episodes, but I've heard me talk about it previously in other episodes, but I'm going to talk about it again because GetFreeai is just a great service. Imagine being able to pay attention to your clients all the time, instead of writing notes and making sure that the note's going to sound good and how are you going to write that note and things like that. Getfreeai liberates you from making sure that you're writing what the client is saying, because it is keeping track of what you're saying and will create, after the end of every session, a progress note. But it goes above and beyond that. Not only does it create a progress note, it also gives you suggestions for goals, gives you even a mental status if you've asked questions around that, as well as being able to write a letter for your client to know what you talked about. So that's the great, great thing. It saves me time, it saves me a lot of aggravation and it just speeds up the progress note process so well. And for $99 a month. I know that that's nothing. That's worth my time, that's worth my money. You know. The best part of it too is that if you want to go and put in the code Steve50 when you get the service at the checkout code is Steve50, you get $50 off your first month and if you get a whole year, you save a whole 10% for the whole year. So again, Steve50 at checkout for getfreeai, We'll give you $50 off for the first month and, like I said, get a full year, get 10% off, get free from writing notes, get free from always scribbling while you're talking to a client and just paying attention to your clients. So they went out, you went out, everybody wins, and I think that this is the greatest thing. And if you're up to a point where you got to change a treatment plan. Well, the goals are generated for you. So getfreeai code Steve50 to save $50 on your first month.

Speaker 2:

Well, hi everyone and welcome to episode 205. Look, returning guests already been on the show. About a month ago was on the premiere show, Love Charlie. So much having Charlie back on Charlie Powell, Dr Charlie Powell, but I call him Charlie and I think everyone else does. But welcome back to Resilience Development in Action.

Speaker 3:

Absolutely. You know, and I will be your Matt Damon to Jimmy Kimmel any day. I'm glad to come on your show and you know we'll just have a good time with it. I really enjoyed that time we spent together.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, but we got to be a little more hostile towards each other.

Speaker 3:

if we're going to do that, Please let's talk about the bikinis and capes again. We're good, yeah.

Speaker 2:

Look, we destroyed some fantasies this morning already. Uh, this is not good, um, but the one good thing is, you know, I know you're going to talk about it during the course of this episode, but I hear that we're getting closer to a release date and we're looking for, um, healing heroes, and I know we talked about it the last time, but one of the things that charlie brought up while we were chatting besides the french maid outfit, and for those, those in my group, you will find this even more hilarious, and if you want the story, write to me or Charlie, we'll let you know. But we were talking also about something very serious how PTSD and addiction is really related to one another. And I know that when you're healing heroes, ptsd and addiction really comes hand in hand. And I know that you know when you're healing heroes, ptsd and addiction really comes hand in hand. And you know, I know that's going to be released very, you know, in the next year.

Speaker 2:

So I wanted to talk about that a little more, because most people don't understand the relationship between PTSD and addiction. They think that you know people who can't handle their shit are actually drinking or doing drugs. But it's not exactly that easy. Can you want to talk about it a little more?

Speaker 3:

No, no, I'd be glad to you know it's interesting. So the show Healing Heroes no Mind Left Behind again, just to remind everybody is is us taking six veterans and well, six heroes, right, veterans and first responders we had fire department New York, police department New Jersey in there and bringing them down for healing. They couldn't find here in the States because it's not legal here. It just hasn't even studied here and after 26 years of being in medicine I'm like WTF guys, why is this not here? Why did I suffer for two decades myself with PTSD and partial treatment and then stumble across this and go down and find immense healing?

Speaker 3:

So, long story short, we take these people down there to go through very innovative programs that bring in multiple philosophies, not just from Western medicine and look, I'm not knocking Western medicine right. It's got some of the best technology out there, but we're lacking in certain areas and in my humble opinion to all my great friends out there in psychiatry and psychology, I think we're just scraping the surface on some things and so many times we're just trying to treat it with another damn pill when we're not getting to the source of what we're doing. So the show is about going through the steps of healing. Now, in these six individuals that we brought down, we also had to kind of knock the barriers down aggressively. They had such thick cement walls around their radioactivity that we had to use two words I never thought would be used together psychedelic and medicine to do that Right.

Speaker 2:

So you, talk about those walls for a second. I want to interrupt you because people don't understand the walls that you create, especially for veterans and first responders. You need to have those walls to survive sometimes, and then sometimes those walls become so big you're not surviving. You're starving yourself from that tension from outside of the world. But please tell me more about that.

Speaker 3:

Let me tell you the analogy I like to use. So I worked trauma ER for a number of years. It was I was adrenaline junkie. It was just kind of my thing. I was so good at it because you turn off the emotion. I had a tactic of just going quick, and it was probably from the first Gulf War, learning just to do personalized and separate yourself out from things. But it got so easy to turn it off and I worked so much I just turned it off. So I like this analogy.

Speaker 3:

So it's like you're sitting in your car and you're listening to the radio and you think, man, this car's got a crappy radio, it's got static in it. Right, Just a little bit. You're trying to listen to your favorite music, but every time you turn it up you got more static. So eventually, when you work in this and you're constantly daily, weekly, monthly, whatever experiencing things in life that most people don't have thrown at them nor are we prepared for, have the tools to handle. It's easy to turn the radio down.

Speaker 3:

Or, in the case of the walls, you build walls around it and then you do that so you can come back and deal with it later. Problem is we just don't take the time to do that. Instead, stuff starts leaking out. You start having symptoms of anxiety. Well, what is anxiety? It's fear without a focus. Well, where's it coming from? Probably one of those leaky walls you're not dealing with in the past. Let's go find it and sometimes, like in my situation when I went through my healing in August of 23, the traumas aren't even things we recognize as traumas.

Speaker 1:

So let's talk about the relationship real quick, you know when I had this.

Speaker 3:

thank you, sir. Thank you. Every once in a while I squeeze out a good one, right drug or alcohol use.

Speaker 3:

And then when we got down there, we found out that over half of them were exactly honest. I'm not going to say which half. I love them. They are my family, y'all are my soul. Love you guys. But they were struggling but they left that 10 days addiction-free, sober and healed. It was amazing. Now tell me what program in the States does that right? So that was the whole premise behind what was going to be the TV series, because I just put my money where my mouth was. I'm like we're going to do the whole series, but we had an opportunity since I saw you last, and that is to change this from a series into a theatrical release. And so November 11th we're going to do a theatrical release. Through right now, amc Theaters shouldn't say anything. Okay, I'll let that one leak a little bit. But no, I think you guys are about to see a new trailer come out around Memorial Day, a big trailer for this this is being released a weekend before your trailer, so I can't wait for the trailer to be out man.

Speaker 3:

That'd be awesome. That'd be awesome. I got some time to get in shape. Maybe look really good for the trailer. Give you a David Hasselhoff or something, I don't know.

Speaker 2:

I hear I'm going to Cancun in October, so please let's keep on subject here. But we'll keep on going. But hey, listen, you're going to see me in my bikini on the because, so that's going to be a great podcast.

Speaker 3:

I'm buying you a cape, sir, because you do good in this world, all right, so as we yank the wheel back on track which both of us are dangerous for that, but no. So look at that. So it really teaches you to cross ties between addiction and PTSD, and you're right. A lot of people think and it is true to some cases, there's no absolutes here that people become addicts because they're self-medicating, and that's true in some cases that they've dealt with so much the alcohol, the street drugs, the prescription drugs, whatever they start becoming a modality of self-medication. But it goes back further than that.

Speaker 3:

You can find plenty of addicts that don't identify as having PTSD. But their addiction may have started earlier in life. But the same commonality traces back usually to trauma in childhood. In fact, most cases of PTSD don't start in adulthood. Yeah, it may have be when I was 19 in the first Gulf War, or it may have been when I was 28 and a trauma surgeon at a big hospital that I saw a lot of shit you just should not have to see in this world. But it really traced back for me to a near drowning experience I had when I was about three and a half years old and so and I didn't even see that as that traumatic so easily easily, my path could have been different. My path could have been no war, no, no ER trauma, stuff, none of that. But I could still wound up with an addiction because there was something there undealt with.

Speaker 3:

You know, levine, I think, defines trauma as what is it? Something that comes at you too fast, too much and too soon, meaning you don't have the tools to deal with it, right, right, I mean amazing thought. Now I've got a slightly different addendum to that definition, because I can never replace the awesomeness of that definition. But it's something from the past that is taking up bandwidth of your present, robbing you of your future, right, wow? And so you look at yeah, no, maybe the Levine Powell thing, I don't know, maybe someday. And so there's so much to that, though that kind of gives the other side explanation. But trauma and addiction some of it is self-medication, but a lot of it is just the commonality of things we're not dealing with, that are walled off, and it's been so long ago we don't even realize it or remember it.

Speaker 2:

Right and I feel like I should just permanently attach the ACEs adverse child events onto every podcast that I do, because most people will see what their score is. The threshold is four out of 10, to be quote diagnosed with PTSD. I don't believe in diagnosis, I just believe in tendencies. But most people who work in emergency rooms, people who are first responders, people in the military, usually score in the seven to eight range and, by the way, same as people in corrections, people who are both the correction staff and the people in the cells. So I think that what I you know, one of my favorites quotes this is from a good friend of mine. He's on the mental men, pat Rice.

Speaker 2:

If you ever watch, listen to these episodes, he says that everything comes down to grief or trauma and if you really really think about it, any diagnosis that you can create comes from grief and or trauma and I believe that firmly and that's what you're kind of like near drowning experience. I mean, that's, you know, like for me, what people want to know. I've said this numerous times on this podcast. My best friend died when I was 12 and I was basically told well, you better play better in football because he's on my football team because he won't be there. And that was my you know my grief process. And again, I don't hold that against anyone for the record. I always keep on reminding that some people say, oh, you sound better, I'm not better. It's just what happened and I think that that's not what made me bitter.

Speaker 3:

Lots of other stuff made me bitter, but that that right Exactly. There's a lot of stuff that makes me better.

Speaker 2:

But anyway, we talked about it previously to this interview, but we can't repeat it on air because it's going to be on air, but at the end of the day, I think that's what happens is that we don't treat that trauma and how we treat it, and we do treat it in other ways. But please go ahead.

Speaker 3:

No, no, I mean, you made an important point, though we don't. We didn't treat as a trauma and I didn't see that as a trauma. And I'll give you examples. A lot of people are surprised to find out that my major traumas that I had to relive when I went through my healing weren't for more time. I mean, I started in 89 in the first Gulf war. I ended in Afghan crisis. That was the bookends of my military career. But it was really my time at a major hospital in trauma surgery and ER that most of my unknown traumas came from.

Speaker 3:

And you think about it In war you get side A versus side B. We're here. One of the two of us is not going to make it out. I hope it's you that doesn't make it out. And we're no hard feelings guys, we both signed off on this. The stuff from war that did get to me were civilian casualties a lot of times, but that's why the majority of my traumas came from being in trauma ER was that when you have a family of five that's hit by a drunk driver who walks away with a large hole in his scalp because that's what the concrete gave him and that's it, and the only survivor of the family of five is a six-year-old little girl who's now a paraplegic and has no family to take care of her. That messes you up.

Speaker 3:

After a period of time, I'll tell you a story. It's a funny antidote. Real quick I had to fix the hole in the guy's head and my attending was like, what are you going to do? I said he needs a skin graft. He goes, this guy's going to jail tonight. And I said, yes, sir, this guy was an old salty dog in the Navy, right, like yes, sir. And so I went in there and you have to do a lot of what's called tissue undermining. You have to go through it. But I closed this thing of the size of a half dollar, to the size of a pinhead, and everybody's standing around watching. Wow, and that's great skills. Look at this man. Now I've removed the drape and the guy's walking out like this, right here. Right, he can't close his right eye, but he went to jail good, good, he wasn't the prettiest guy.

Speaker 3:

But yeah, you know, and again, I don't I have to. You know sense of humor that comes along with medicine. Some days you got to have those things to kind of pad it. But you know, back, know, back back to the stuff, though. Is that before we?

Speaker 2:

go on. If that's, you just made a very good point too. I believe that you know what do they call it? I call it sometimes dark humor, I sometimes call it gallows humor. But to survive these jobs and even first responder listening to this will nod enthusiastically. People who work in the yards will will say, damn, right, right. And people who've been in the military will do so. So I don't want to minimize that, because a lot of people who are civilians and I'm considered a civilian, I'm fine with that. Uh, don't get it, but I worked in an er. I had to have a weird sense of humor in order to survive it. Uh, right, so let's, let's not play that down, because I hate when people it's not, oh, you don't care, it's not that I don't care, but I need something to survive.

Speaker 3:

And you know, and being in community with others that have been through things with you, I heard I think it was an admiral that said once PTSD would not be the problem in the middle from from in veterans, if you just didn't leave the military Right. So what I would tell you out there for first responders are heroes that are on the front lines every freaking day, both there in the emergency rooms and every place else. Don't lose your community. And, yeah, those six hits of humors. People don't need to overhear that stuff, right, but it's how we cope with it. And you know, look, I know your listeners that have been through this are probably going to tell this, and I just had to do a shoot in Phoenix for the movie and I told a story I didn't think I'd ever tell on film.

Speaker 3:

the story was about a time where I was learning forgiveness and I won't go into great detail other than um yeah, it was a it was I'll keep it for the movie, but I will say for your listeners it was a murder, suicide of a father that had been raping his daughter since she was seven. And you know, for each of everybody out there is listening to this, the father did not make it. I pronounced him immediately. Way too much gray matter gone and I was working on the daughter, who's not 35. And she was telling me how great this guy was.

Speaker 3:

You know, and I'm just looking over there and I want to tell you there's guilt that comes sometimes with me in my head, thinking I am so glad that MF is dead, right, and you walk out of that with a little bit of guilt. I shouldn't feel that way about another human being, but guess what? It's okay, that was a bad human being, but it's not something you need to talk about to other people that don't understand it. But you've got to have community in what you're doing. Community and purpose Loss of those two things are big malfunctions for a lot of people, and you can have that sense of humor in your small community, but don't ever, ever, get away from the power of community, and having people in there it can help guide you through this stuff, right.

Speaker 2:

I agree. And first of all, the only thing that came to mind listening to this is for for people who are older. There's an old arrow Smith song called Janie's Got a Gun. That's all I could think of when you were saying that story. And if you don't know that song, go listen to it, you'll understand.

Speaker 2:

But no, and I think that that's it is that you know we have our thoughts and then everyone in society tells us wow, that thought's wrong. You can't feel that way, charlie. Well, within our small community, most people go. I get it, I absolutely get it, and I think that sometimes in the community like, oh, that's not appropriate. Listen, I don't deal with appropriate shit. Anyway, I don't deal with you know whose Rolls Royce we're going to take to go to this dinner. I don't deal with that shit. I deal with very, very hard stuff and I can't really have a sense. I can't have always the sense of humor that's appropriate, but I try to keep it to the right people. That's why me and charlie call regularly so we can get it out of our system right and trust me, we're gonna have so much fun down.

Speaker 3:

I can't go. When you come down for that show buddy um, so much fun, we're gonna spray tan you for it. Uh, we're gonna have. Yeah, get it going um, but no go on youtube and see that one. Guys, this could be a match and a stick of dynamite mixed together when we do this, but we're gonna do it, brother, um no, so you know what I tell people is I'm sober now, I don't drink anymore.

Speaker 3:

I'm more dangerous than when I was drinking yeah, right, because now I have no excuse I can have to. I can do it all the time. Now, right, I can be me all the time.

Speaker 3:

So you know, it's interesting no, no, we'd have a great time. We're gonna have a great time. You know it's uh, community and purpose are two big things. You know, I've got, uh, I've got a concept. I've been working on a bit um for for getting some information out too, and we've been trying to think of what I want to call this show and finally we figured out the name of the show is going to be Dr Charlie A-B-N-Normal Because abnormal, right, and you don't get much more abnormal than me, buddy, and I'll include you in my family circle of abnormal.

Speaker 3:

But it's really celebrating the fact that the uh, the fact that we're all abnormal, they're abnormal is the normal, and it's okay not to be okay. And you know what? Celebrate your abnormality. Talk about it, because I think maybe, if we did, maybe mental health wouldn't have the such the damn stigma that it does. You know that that's really where I hope this movie goes and I'm really pushing for healing heroes.

Speaker 3:

No mind left behind to go is that people watch the story of these six amazing heroes, which, for you, those heroes out there that are listening, that are battling this every day, or might tell you the story about the police officer I pulled over the other night, but, um, anyway, they're battling this every day. It's okay, and it's okay to talk about it because you're not. There's nothing wrong with you, right? This is, this is stuff that you put any system under the right amount of stress, it's going crack. What will be the be? The problem is if you don't do something about it, right, if you don't address it and talk to somebody here that bottled up for decades, it's just not healthy, man, you wake up one day and you're covered in ink and you're crazy, you know, um, but uh, no, that's just me, no that that's.

Speaker 2:

That's okay. I think most people need that I want to tell you.

Speaker 3:

I want to tell you about a story about a police officer.

Speaker 2:

I pulled over right, I listen I listen, I was I'm waiting for that story because when you said about I just want to add one thing when people use this is a long time ago, no one comes and does this with me anymore. When you got a business called straight to the point therapy, don't people don't come in like that. But when I worked in a community mental health, someone would come in and say I just want to be normal. I said you're not aiming high, are you? And that got me in trouble sometimes. But I'm like who wants to be normal and who the hell is normal? Yeah, why? Like who wants to?

Speaker 3:

be normal. And who the hell is normal? Yeah, why settle? Because the definition of normal, I guess most people would say, is well what everybody else is. Well, I got an old thing when I was a practicing physician all patients lie, that's just the rule of thumb. And not faulting anybody doctors and providers we're the worst patients of all. So don't think I'm knocking you at all.

Speaker 2:

But I've been coughing many days, only a couple of days, only a couple.

Speaker 3:

Um, how long has that testicle been a size of a softball? Oh, just a couple of weeks. There is no way it's been a couple of weeks, right, and don't even get me on some war stories. Um, so what's the? What is it with drinking? The rule of three multiply times three.

Speaker 2:

Oh yeah, that was mine too. Like oh, you say, you only had three drinks, that means nine.

Speaker 3:

And if they're, and if they're, like me, from Louisiana, you multiply times six, so that's just how it goes.

Speaker 2:

My regulars. I always knew. But some of the regulars got to know me and they would be actually like, oh, I'll be, I know I can be honest with you. So they tell me like 15 and I'm like I appreciate the honesty we're all scared of judgment right judgment by who?

Speaker 3:

somebody else? That's abnormal. Don't be scared about that. If they're judging you because they're abnormal, it's because they're more insecure than you are. Deal with it, all right. I absolutely agree.

Speaker 2:

it's the same thing with drugs. When people would say I mean, you know, oh, five bags of heroin, I'm like, yeah, ok, whatever, that means what? At least a gram a day, two grams a day. And then people would be like, how do you know? I'm like lucky guess. And then the other part, too, that I always found interesting is that oh, it's my favorite one is I had a guy leave jail and tell me that he only used opioids two to three times a week. I'm like I've never met someone who does that ever. So please do not lie to me.

Speaker 3:

Well, yeah, there's no sense in it. You know, I had one guy it was actually a young lady, not that one, she was in her mid thirties and she, you could tell she was beautiful. At one point, and I asked her how long she'd been on crystal meth, she goes, how'd you know? I said, because you're wearing a shirt, that says my birthstone is crystal meth.

Speaker 2:

You can't make this shit up. You cannot make this shit make it up.

Speaker 3:

You can't make it up. Yeah, I thought the shirt was hilarious, but it it was. It was a great. It was a great uh. It was a great opportunity to build a relationship with it. But no, I was uh. But no, I was going down the road the other day.

Speaker 2:

I want to hear this police officer story.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you remember my back story is that back in 22, I sold everything. I sold very big. I mean I did really well. That was the most unhappy I'd ever been in my life. I mean, you think everybody that's got the American dream the money, the cars, everything, blah, blah, blah. Got the American dream, the money, the cars, everything, blah, blah, blah. No, I was miserable man. I couldn't get out of bed on the weekends but anyway. So, um, I had some leftovers from that life because I walked away from most of it all. One of them was this really beautiful McLaren that um was in the shop the majority of the time. Right, sorry, british cars have not been good to me, but, um, but it was in the shop most of the time McLarens too.

Speaker 3:

And well you know, the British cars just all seem to have messed up grills. Will you get it?

Speaker 2:

Okay, look at my teeth, but anyway, go ahead.

Speaker 3:

All right, all right, so I digress. But no, with the McLaren I was in the shop a lot. So when I would drive it, I would enjoy it. So when I would drive it, I would enjoy it. And I was out on the highway and I was talking to one of the participants actually from the show who was having a rough time after her father passed. And I look in my mirror and red and blues and I am looked down, I'm doing 91 like oopsie. You don't even realize it. In this vehicle Right now I will say oh God, please don't judge me.

Speaker 3:

This is my license plate frame said may I Retired porn star. My license plate frame said may I Retired porn star? And it was just there for a joke, right, it was just there for a joke. My license plate frame says retired porn star. And you know business that, hey, it's not far off. But I remember it took me a while to get pulled over because it was a tollway.

Speaker 3:

And once we got off he came up. He was very nice, I had my hands on the steering wheel because I can look, I can look sketchy as all get out Right. And he comes up and we're talking for a little bit and said I don't have my license, I didn't bring my wallet. I'm sorry, but I have my. I have my number memorized and here's my. I haven't had my passport, my backpack, but anyway. So he's very, very nice guy and so, in it all, he stops before he goes back.

Speaker 3:

He goes by the way, what do you do for a living? I'm like not what my license plate says, I swear to God. He starts laughing a little bit. He goes. No, what do you do? And I told him about the show. He goes.

Speaker 3:

Wow, I said, you know, I'm not saying this to get off. A guys are out there because you have to treat everybody like a friendly. We're at war, you know who the enemy is mostly not all the time and you know somebody's a bad guy. Now you're always on guard. I said but you guys have to be on guard and treat everybody like a friendly until you identify they're not and then act quickly and save your butt and everybody else is around you. And he goes. He starts to tear up a bit Right and um, I can see it. He goes back to his car. He comes back and he hands me a warning. He goes. Hey, I would have given you the warning. In a way, I just appreciate you being honest about everything. Um, he goes um, I, I, I. I suffer from it too. I said let's talk, brother, he goes um. I said but look, here's, here's my number. And I said you give me a call. He called me two days later and we talked about it.

Speaker 2:

And he talked about.

Speaker 3:

Usually it's a 24 hour window right, I know I was so surprised it was at 48,. Right, I was very surprised it was at 48, which tells me it took some courage buildup or he was on shift or you know he lost my number. But anyway, he told me about an incident where he was pulling over, looked like a friendly and then the shotgun went off from the back seat, through the door, hit him, and he relives that every time he walks up to a damn vehicle. Now he goes. He won my respect when I saw both your hands on your steering wheel and you were so open to me. I said and plus, I didn't have a back seat. So there you go.

Speaker 3:

And he chuckled and I said man, look, I've got some good people I want to hook you up with. I don't think I don't know if you need the power and the level of what I do and where I guide these people. I said but you've got the biggest respect for me. I mean, you guys are heroes and every single day I think underappreciated and what you have to put up with. But can I make a recommendation to you? He goes, yeah sure. I said are you married? He goes 14 years. And I said would you also look at therapy with your wife. He goes yeah, yeah, sure, why I said you wouldn't believe how much it affects them to watch us go through it and give her the love she deserves to, and he did so. My story is I pulled him over that night right Because the serendipity and how it all worked out I got a warning. It was a great opportunity to heal. So, yeah, that's my story. I pulled over a police officer, a hero.

Speaker 2:

Very great story and absolutely something that is. I know that healing heroes talks about it too, but never neglect the family members and what they go through and the resentment sometimes and the number of times they bite their tongue not to comment on shit. Um, because they don't want to make you feel bad right they don't want to make you feel bad, right.

Speaker 3:

They don't want to make you feel worse than you already feel, because you don't want to make them feel like they're doing a bad job because they've already been through so much. But at the same time, the conversations aren't happening the other direction because they don't want you to know how screwed up they are. Big breakdown there. Big breakdown.

Speaker 2:

They are big breakdown there, big breakdown. I think that what what I? I wish there was a better service about treating the family members as much as treating the actual officers firefighters, emts, paramedics you know I'm not trying to neglect anyone military, er staff, correction staff because the family members go through their own stuff.

Speaker 2:

You know, like what's that old World War II saying, the thousand mile stare? Oh yeah, and I've certainly again not comparing myself to any one of those people, but when you work in the emergency room and you hear some fucked up shit, there's days where I walked into my, my home, and it was like my then wife said to me bad day, huh, I'm like you have no clue, but she knew to leave me alone because she didn't, and then of course she was suffering, and then for different reasons and I'm not putting my putting her stuff out there, that's her own shit and I respect her, so I don't want to do that, but ultimately I also made her go through stuff because of that. Um yeah, no doubt, no doubt, you can't forget about the family.

Speaker 3:

Well, and I'll I'll share my personal story. I mean, 30 years with an individual. It's like why not just get it to the end, where it is far Right. But, um, you know, when I went through my healing and I have the same good things to say about my ex um is that, um, you know she had to put up with so much over that time. And, look, I wasn't abusive, I wasn't violent, but I was isolated.

Speaker 3:

And that isolation, ladies and gentlemen out there listening, brothers and sisters, it's painful when they're isolated from you, but they don't feel comfortable talking to you about it. But they see it. Look, I was getting up every two hours with night terrors and I would, literally, I would have sleep paralysis. I would wake up and I would feel hands grabbing my ankles to yank me out of the bed into hell. Who the hell am I going to tell that to? Right, I was a practicing physician with a medical license that gets out. Oh, suddenly I can't pay the bills anymore. I know some of you feel the same way, but if you don't address it, you're hurting those that you're out there doing it for. You're out there working and busting your asses out there, putting your ass on the line, the people you love, but they're also the ones that are suffering because what comes home to them is a lesser version than what they deserve.

Speaker 2:

Right, and I'm going to go even further than what you said and I'm going to dig a little deeper. The silence that you put your partner through when you're going through your own stuff in the silence. You may not consider that verbal abuse or trauma in that way, but it is absolutely verbal abuse and trauma. And if you don't believe me, go without talking to your partner for eight hours straight, purposefully, and know how much it affects them and see how long you can really resist not talking. And sometimes that silence can be also as bad.

Speaker 3:

It can be. I mean, there's effective silence, right to bring the truth out in some cases, the pregnant pause and everything, but the prolonged silence. I'm going to say this and it's going to sound really strong, but I'm going to step on a ledge and say this it's as bad as being unfaithful. And let me say why. Let me put it together. I agree, by the way.

Speaker 3:

What is infidel? What is in unfaithfulness? Unfaithful means you have lost faith in somebody and you, when you've been unfaithful, you've lost faith in them. That's what it means unfaithful. And that's exactly what you're doing with the silence. You're being unfaithful to them that they can handle it and that they're your partner and they can help you get through it. And it may be appropriate unfaithfulness because they don't have the tools to deal with either, right, but I'm just saying, put it on that If you want to level set, how great, how office is, people put a lot of times infidelity is the worst thing you possibly do. Unfaithfulness and that silence. I put it pretty much on a close level, my opinion well, I, you know.

Speaker 2:

You know unfaithfulness is not the number one cause of divorce. Most people think it is, but it's not. Number one is financial stressors, and then lack of communication is number three, or something like that. Um, so, you know, when you think about the people, and I think fourth or fifth is being unfaithful, physically or psychologically, whatever people like to call it, I don't care. But the point is, is that try again, if you ever try?

Speaker 2:

If someone doesn't talk to you for a day, eight hours a week, and they just look pissed or they act pissed or they say things that are pissy when they do do talk, that's more torture to me than going on a call where someone wants to jump to me. That's more like that's more torture, because the jump, I hate to say it. And if I'm again too colloquial here, you go after me. Guys, I go to the call. It never lasts more than an hour. We succeed or we don't, and I'm not trying to say that that's good, I'm just saying we succeed or we don't. And then you go to the next call Eight hours of. I don't know what I did wrong or what's wrong with him. Is he mad at me? All those questions that you got to ponder for your own. 60,000, 80,000 thoughts in a day and sitting with that, that's more tortured than an hour.

Speaker 3:

Call Just for the record, that's, that's powerful, it really is and very well said, communication. You know it's. It's essential in relationship and you know they. This was not really described when I went through school nearly three decades ago, but the avoidant, dismissive relationship type, right where they're the carpet sweepers and then they just dismiss it, it's like folks imagine having the dirty house. It's the person that just throws everything in the closet and that closet door is just bulging at times. Right. By the way, I'm going to add a contraindication to psychedelic medicine. Use that one, because you're going to let everything out at one time and if they still don't have the tools to process it, whoa, you're going to have a dangerous situation.

Speaker 3:

But no avoidant dismissives are very common and basically they just don I'm a bulldozer. I am a bulldozer, I like to go into the problem, fix the problem, move on. At least that's who I am now. I wasn't. I wasn't avoiding to a certain extent on my own problems, but I was a bulldozer and everybody else's just. Uh, I guess, pay attention to yourself and how you deal with it. If you find that you're one of the avoidant people and you're not talking, not letting it out.

Speaker 2:

It's not going going away. It's still in the closet right and I think that what you just counter indicated, I will um add to it. I do, I movement reprocess. Uh, why am I? Okay, I just came back from vacation.

Speaker 3:

Truthfully, emdr, get the car you bring, bring, bring I, I movement, desensitization and reprocessing.

Speaker 2:

Thank, thank you very much Boom.

Speaker 3:

yes.

Speaker 2:

And when people ask me when do I do it With people, I said not until I know them for six months. And people are like that's crazy and I'm like no, because you're going to be opening up a can of worms that's going to open other channels. That might be things that you haven't talked about to anyone in years, if ever haven't talked about to anyone in years, if ever. And if you don't have the inherent trust of the person in front of you, I think that that plays a huge factor of how you're going to be in EMDR again in the future.

Speaker 2:

So my two rules are six months or you're seeing a therapist I know and trust, and then, yeah, you can come in, because maybe they don't do EMDR and I do it. So you can come in, I'll do your EMDR, knowing that you can go process that with them and they trust in me. So you trust me because of that. But ultimately, when we go into a lot of trauma work, you have no clue what's going to come out, because what you've opened up will open up shit underneath there that you haven't seen in years the wall over the wall over the wall that we talked about earlier. So you got to make sure you do that properly.

Speaker 3:

You know, steve, I'll say this is. This has been one of the best Western sizzling buffets we could ever have. On topics right, because there's been some great ones out there, or golden corral, let's go. That's golden corral level of buffet.

Speaker 2:

They're coming back. Baby, they're coming back.

Speaker 3:

But corral level of buffet coming back. Baby, they're coming back, but um, you know it's um. But. All great topics and and great tidbits on this, but I I will tell you about emdr. I am the biggest fan of what I've seen it do. In fact, we did not incorporate emdr into the first set of series of people coming through this because of that fact that, a well, it's just still learning about its efficacy and I mean I see great things from it. And and for anybody out there that's listening to this that has sat there and says I've done talk therapy, I've done group therapy, I've done ssris, snri, blah blah, right, give emdr a chance with somebody that knows what they're doing.

Speaker 2:

Right now I'm like, look, if I, if I didn't believe in EMDR, I wouldn't do it myself.

Speaker 2:

But I definitely do EMDR and too many people and I'm going to save names, obviously because clinical information but there's some people who come to me and say I did EMDR, that was great, but then they didn't give me any tools in the back or in the front in order to deal with other traumas that might've come up. And now I feel as fucked up as I was previous to my EMDR. And this is years and years ago. Someone mentioned that to me and since then that's been my process, my practice of doing EMDR only with people who are in therapy, with someone they trust or me, for at least six months so that they can trust me when the harder shit comes up. And I think that that's why the EMDR process of eight to 12 weeks sounds really, really good for most people, but for me, after eight weeks and you're feeling better, you still need to process stuff because you've got to develop the skills and if you trauma right, you got to give skills as well as process it.

Speaker 3:

Right Before you start, you've got to have the tools right, and if you didn't have the tools when the traumas happened, if you didn't have them when you were younger, because you've been an avoidant, dismissive type person your whole life, that just pushes it away. You need to get the tools. You know another topic and we can hold this for another show if you want to, but why don't we teach emotional intelligence in schools?

Speaker 2:

You can hold this for another show if you want to, but why don't we teach emotional intelligence in schools? You know, you mentioned that in the last one and we didn't even talk about it today. What I want to do is, when I go down to cancun, we can start about emotional intelligence, because let's do it to do that and, you know, get ready for your release, as we. You know, I'm looking at the time. I really want to keep it to about this amount of time.

Speaker 2:

So, you know, let's talk about something to me that's again getting very clear, that it's getting dear to my heart is I want to hear about Healing Heroes. I know that you're talking about a second trailer coming out for Memorial Day. And I can't wait to hear more about it, like how is it going to be from? I thought you were saying six to nine weeks of a series to a movie.

Speaker 3:

That's a lot of cutting. That's a lot of cutting, but it's got a lot of impact. Just imagine it this way. I chose this strategically because, yes, it's a lot of cutting, it's a lot of compacting and, yeah, there's going to be a lot of things that can come out and supplemental, or people can go to the YouTube and watch or to our website and watch right To get the background and some of the better stories definitely the gag reels. You got to see the gag reels but it's um, but it's beautiful stories that you know.

Speaker 3:

Attention span these days has gotten so short because of social media and the way it's structured, that we want to be very impactful. But then once the streamer picks up the movie, they get to pick up the series and our spinoff, squared Away Nation, the TV show, which is a second show that's coming out Really cool show on that and it's actually showing the solidarity of veterans and first responders and how they can solve community problems. But anyway, so you know when it comes out. So let me tell you this First of all, we launched our first trailer on Veterans Day of last year and I was honestly looking for maybe a million views in a couple of months. We have something to approach the streamers with. We had 4 million views in three and a half days. It was that powerful, wow. And ain't seen nothing yet. Baby right, when this comes out on Memorial Day, I think it's going to be the biggest splash. It's going to be great cuts we decided to take.

Speaker 3:

I decided to take a direction I wasn't really willing to at first, and that's to tell my own story, which you know we tend to hold those things dear to heart. But one of the directors on the shows is just like Charlie, it's your story that started this. It's got to be the story that starts telling the story. And boy, it's a lot of one-sided counseling, maybe right into the camera, right? Yeah, it's scary to do that, but I kept thinking to myself this is going to help other people this vulnerability people think vulnerability is a weakness. It's not. It's a strength, and so I hope you see that in this and understand that PTSD is not a diagnosis of special forces, of combat, of war, of even first responders and those that are on the front line that called me crazy for what I did when I left and walked away from everything. What are you doing. You've killed your brain. You just ruined yourself. Right, I was already ruined, guys. I just made it better and I came out the best version of myself.

Speaker 3:

But I tell them what system breaks down in the body enzymatically or from a viral infection, or something breaks in the body to cause depression, insomnia, anxiety, right, it is stress, it is trauma, it is life. It's the challenging things in life that we just didn't learn the lesson from. So why are we treating it the way that we are just putting a pill on it to mask the symptoms, to control the symptoms, and not getting back to the reason why it happened to us? Because chances are the worst it was, the better the learnings you can come from it. Because I challenge anybody out there imagine the biggest accomplishments you've ever had in life and tell me which one was it hard or difficult to get through. So now look back on this and say then let me carry something home from this, and the only thing that does that is working with guys like Steve that are out there to help guide you through it, to untie the negative emotion to the past, learn a lesson from it and jump into your body and move forward.

Speaker 2:

I can't say anything other than there's nothing more fascinating to me than any TV show, movie, reality, whatever you want to call it of a person talking about their own problems and like a monologue, as some people have mentioned it. But to me that's the most powerful thing. And when you put yourself out there, there's always that risk. And I will tell you, Charlie, the little that I know. I can't wait to hear it. But, more importantly, putting yourself out there takes a lot of guts, takes a lot of courage, but you'll be shocked how many people will be supportive of you, and I will be one of them. Whether we get along or not in Cancun, I'll still support you and I really I give a high likelihood of good time.

Speaker 3:

Right, we're going to have a great time.

Speaker 2:

I mean, I'm looking forward to it. I mentioned it already twice on a podcast ask how many people I do that. But on this note, charlie, I gotta wrap it up. I will see you in cancun sometime at in the beginning of the fall, and we're gonna get ready for that release on veterans day. But first and foremost, in a couple of days Day, we'll be releasing the second trailer. I will attach it as soon as it's out, and I will put the trailer of the first trailer from a couple of months ago on there too. Charlie, thank you so much for coming on again.

Speaker 3:

Hey, if you ever need me, I'm here for you too. Steve, Just let me know. I'm glad to do anything with you. You're fun to work with.

Speaker 2:

Thank you, charlie, you do great work, and you do deserve a cape. Well, thank you, charlie, I will wear it and I'll see you guys on episode 206. Thank you very much. Well, that completes episode 205. Again, charlie Powell, thank you so much for coming. Come back for episode 206, where we're going to talk to Cindy Doyle, and I hope you join us.

Speaker 1:

Please like, subscribe and follow this podcast on your favorite platform. A glowing review is always helpful and, as a reminder, this podcast is for informational, educational and entertainment purposes only. If you're struggling with a mental health or substance abuse issue, please reach out to a professional counselor for consultation. If you are in a mental health crisis, call 988 for assistance. No-transcript.

People on this episode

Head Shot

Steve Bisson

Host
Head Shot

Dr. Charlie Powell

Guest